Colorado song, feedback appreciated!

[daniel481]

I wrote this song "Colorado (This Is What We Live For)" for this new listing:AAA/POP-ROCK & MODERN ROCK SONGS (with vocals) about the state of COLORADO are needed by the Music Supervisor of a major cable TV network for their upcoming broadcasts of the MLB World Series. Think about the tradition of the game, baseball as an American institution, the history of the World Series, etc. Other lyrical themes could include Rockies, Coors Field, Rocky Mountains, Colorado River, mile high, mountain tops, river runners, etc. They also need positive/emotional/inspirational songs with the following general topics: winning/victory, over-coming obstacles, long road to get where we are, accomplishment, beating the odds, etc. Your CHORUS needs to capture their ear and really be the "meat" of your song - a passing line about Colorado or beating the odds in the 4th verse or 2nd bridge of your tune simply isn't going to cut it. =-) They need songs that will be easy for their editors to place during their telecasts. Musically and style-wise, they want commercial Pop-Rock a la the Fray, Train, Sheryl Crow, Snow Patrol, Michelle Branch, etc., but are open to harder-sounding Modern Rock a la Audioslave and the Foo Fighters (but nothing heavier/harder than these guys - no Metal). Male or female vocals are OK and all tempos are OK as well. They asked us to be extra selective when screening the submissions for this listing. Broadcast quality needed [excellent home recordings are OK]. Please submit one to three songs online or per CD, include lyrics. All submissions will be screened on a YES/NO BASIS ONLY - NO CRITIQUES FROM TAXI. For ground submissions, please enclose a S.A.S.E. if you would like a response. As always, we will notify everyone via e-mail, whether your submissions have been Forwarded or Returned. Submissions must be received no later than 4:00 PM, Pacific Standard Time (California time), Monday, Oct. 15, 2007. TAXI # D071015COYou can find the song at taxi.com/dandiaz. I'd love to see what you guys think!Thanks,Dan

[johnhampt]

I'll be as impartial as I can since I am from Phoenix and you guys are whooping us!!! I think all the elements are there. It seems the chorus would be emphasized if the song was in a higher key. More shouting. The whole part around 2:30, the words were a bit crammed and I couldn't understand what was being said a few times. Posting the words would help. Overall I think you did a good job. Again, I think it's the chorus that's just a tad lackluster. I like the hook but a different key or maybe higher harmonies that are more prominent are what's needed....

[daniel481]

Thanks for the tips! Here are the lyrics if that helps:The leaves are redIn Rocky townThe mountain tops are coolin' downWe've hit the fall Though fleeting its amazing The Aspen trees a site to seeIt's Almost time to ride those skisThe river runsAnd fun is what we're chasingYeah the Fall Classics hereAmericas favorite time of yearAnd if you listen closely you'll always hear us cheerSo Colorado play ball tonightOctober's here The time is right For 7 gamesTo show them what we live forAnd Colorado let's rock tonightA mile high and we'll be alrightAt Coors Field, lets show 'em who we cheer forFrom Western Slope to BreckenridgeOur ski resorts are happenin'And everyone is rooting for the hometeamCome on let's throw some strikesWe won't forget these nightsThe party it's happenin'Oh yeah we gotta winCome on lets make it fun We only want some runsThe Rockies will be number oneOh yeah it's just begun