Re: More electric guitars

mazz · Post by **mazz** » Sat Sep 01, 2007 12:42 pm

Hey man, I can't judge the guitar tone too much on my crappy speakers at work but one thing on the arrangement: do the chorus twice in a row when the distorted guitar comes in, the interlude kills the vibe there but it works great after the second chorus.What are you trying to accomplish with the guitars? The song doesn't seem like a hard rock song per-se and the amount of distortion on the guitars seems about right when they kick in.Great singing as usual! I think mixing the voice back a little bit might make the mix sound more cohesive.Ciao,Mazz

geo · Post by **geo** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 5:11 am

Hi, ho, Geo here, liked the song a lot, good build, I like the C B C arrangement at the end, I wouldn't change it. Two suggestions up the tempo a bit (a common mistake we ALL make) and I would consider a dramatic interlude (short solo, melody accentuation, etc.) after the first chorus. I felt it coming but then it was like oh, he went there. But all in all a good song, love the lyrics...Geo

mazz · Post by **mazz** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 9:28 am

Yes, I'm talking about the short bridge. Just my taste, I wanted to hear the chorus right away a second time and then use the bridge as the fade.The other thing I thought when I heard it again was maybe the bridge could be half as long as it is now, that might work.Just my taste, I may not like it when I hear it but in my head it works!! Mazz

liamkelly · Post by **liamkelly** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 2:46 pm

Quote:Hi Mazz, good points. I agree the voice is too far out in front. I tried to take this song in a bit looser vocal direction than I normally sing. With the guitars I don't have any real goals other than to make them sound good. This wouldn't be hard rock, I agree with that. I am not clear on the "chorus twice in a row" comment. Are you suggesting I toss the bridge where it switches to the acoustic guitar?Hey SongwriterI like the vocals out in front like that. There's a very James Morrison feel about this track - somewhere between blue eyed soul and pop rock. I would really develop this if I were you and forget about the technicalities of the guitar sound for now. You've got that layered thing going and that soaring organ and metaphors like 'back on the shelf', 'traded gold for stone', 'circles 'neath my eyes', 'I'd have stuck at home with you' - it really does have potential. The melodies are great and the vocals are very real especially where they break up at 'years gone by' 'circles' at the top of your range. Sounds like you really mean it when you have to push the top notes a bit.I have listened to quite a few tracks from your very prolific output and I really think that although some of the sounds here need work (the crunch gtrs, bass and drums) the melody is very close to top drawer. Spend some time on this one.The piano motif works, as do the dampened gtr chords at 58 secs, the organ, and lyrical message. And the vocals (the last 'gonna click again at 2.58 sounds a bit un-natural).There is something very captivating about this.Liam

liamkelly · Post by **liamkelly** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 2:50 pm

Quick extra:I don't feel that the quick major chord run up to the second verse (at 35 secs) works in this soul context.Am I the only one in here who thinks this sounds soul?