Fall Again - work in progress

[dada]

Hey all,Please tell me your first impression thoughts on this tune... Going for something edgy and different... This is definitely different... hard rock contemporary... The song is first on the soundclick site called "Fall Again".....Later,DaveThe Davewavehttp://www.soundclick.com/bands/pagemusic.cfm?bandid=189280

[gitarrero]

just listening...- the intro is a little bit to long I guess- after the brigde there's no chorus ... or is what I call the bridge already the chorus...? After the 2nd bridge theres another part "..I fall again.." - I gues that is the chorus (?). If so, I would suggest to bring the chorus much earlier.-how many verses has this song..? 3 or even 4? and 1 chorus?Playing/production: I'm listening over PC-Spekers, but as far as I heared the playing seems to be good.facit: I miss some clear structur and a chorus-hook that goes in the ear.Besides that it sounds well played/sung and recorded.I think (like always) it depends for which listing you submit this song - maybe Indie would be a possibility (?) since the stucture is defenitly not Mainstream-Rock in the current form.cheers!Martin

[dada]

Martin,Thanks for checking it out and your comments... That is exactly the kind of listen I was looking for... I didn't spend alot of time on this and the whole thing basically repeats itself with a double chorus on the end... I was using the guitar chop in different forms as the hook so to speak... You are right in that it is probably not mainstream, but that is my nature trying to think out of the box, but still create catchy pieces..Thanks,Dave

[aubreyz]

Quote:Hey all,Please tell me your first impression thoughts on this tune... Going for something edgy and different... This is definitely different... hard rock contemporary... The song is first on the soundclick site called "Fall Again".....Later,DaveThe Davewavehttp://www.soundclick.com/bands/pagemusic.cfm? ... 0Dave,Some very interesting elements there. I agree with Martin about the structure. It sort of rambles around without landing on a real hook. Lot's of potential though. Good voice -- love the bass sound and groove change about 3:45. Needs a chorus lift and more lyrics if you are going to repeat the verse that much. The bridge is a nice idea, but doesn't seem to take me anywhere. Also, I'd like to hear more of a setup for the double time snare, but that could just be a taste thing. Some very cool stuff though. I'll be interested to see how it progresses.I don't think it's that out of the mainstream. Kind of audioslave meets stp.

[dada]

Aub,Thanks for your time and comments.. This was a quicky throw together using the guitar riffs I came up with and putting a vocal line together or two... I agree some more time spent could really make this better.. I love the ones that just come together without much effort, and that is where I am with it today... Appreciate your thoughts on the piece as far as musically and being interesting... I've been on your site before and also listened to your lastest instrumental pieces that got forwarded and I must say I truly respect your opinion... I haven't joined TAXI quite yet as I feel I have more polishing to do on my craft, but throwing together these pieces and the like should give me a good library of ideas to go back to when the time comes...Thanks again,DaveThe Davewavehttp://www.soundclick.com/bands/pagemusic.cfm?bandid=189280