I fall down...

[opensky]

Here's a first mix of a new song, so i know there will be plenty to critique. Fire away. Thanks for your fresh ears.http://www.soundclick.com/opensky

[tkrochock]

Hey man-Good track. A couple of things occured to me while listening to it-Every once in a while it can be supremely effective to throw a different chord under your lyrics. It helps to keep the song fresh and can help give more meaning to your hook, which I think is already very effectiveAlso, I'm no big time producer, but it seems like doing something to your drum sound can help heighten the emotion of the track. Your drummer plays some nice triplet figures. I might like to hear that sound opened up a bit more, perhaps with moving the placement of the drum sound or something like a reverb that will enhance the image of the sound and help give it more of a "larger than life" type of soundHope this helps. Keep on doing what you love. Many props that you are willing to go to such great lengths have the best product you canRegards, Tom K

[Casey H]

HeyI listened a few times and really liked the song. The vocal is a little off pitch sometimes. I don't think the production does justice to the song but I am not sure why. There is a great song in there that needs to be brought out more.Thanks for sharing! Casey

[aubreyz]

Steve,Nice tune. I like the message a lot. A couple of suggestions:‘Cause I fall down, before youAnd I have fallen down…If I understand the point you are trying to make, this is both about worship AND our own shortcomings. It might make the point more clear if you said:‘Cause I fall down, before youWhen I have fallen down…The only other thing I would like to hear is what happens after you fall down before Him. There needs to be a bridge or something that tells the story of being lifted up. Maybe the last line of the chorus could do that, or a tag line after the chorus.Just some ideas. It’s a good song. Great concept!

[aubreyz]

btw- Just wanted to let you know that I woke up this morning humming this tune. Not a bad sign. I only listened to it once yesterday... good hook.

[opensky]

Quote:Hey man-Good track. A couple of things occured to me while listening to it-Every once in a while it can be supremely effective to throw a different chord under your lyrics. It helps to keep the song fresh and can help give more meaning to your hook, which I think is already very effectiveAlso, I'm no big time producer, but it seems like doing something to your drum sound can help heighten the emotion of the track. Your drummer plays some nice triplet figures. I might like to hear that sound opened up a bit more, perhaps with moving the placement of the drum sound or something like a reverb that will enhance the image of the sound and help give it more of a "larger than life" type of soundHope this helps. Keep on doing what you love. Many props that you are willing to go to such great lengths have the best product you canRegards, Tom KThanks Tom! I have since come out with a new remix which features an improved drum sound. If you have a chance, please check it out and let me know if you think it's improved.

[opensky]

Quote:HeyI listened a few times and really liked the song. The vocal is a little off pitch sometimes. I don't think the production does justice to the song but I am not sure why. There is a great song in there that needs to be brought out more.Thanks for sharing! Casey Thanks Casey. My problem is I don't have an ear for vocals as I am not the vocalist. So i have to rely on the autotune. I thought i had pretty much "cleaned it up" but apparently i haven't. Could you tell me what parts or words are still off-key? Thanks.

[opensky]

Quote:btw- Just wanted to let you know that I woke up this morning humming this tune. Not a bad sign. I only listened to it once yesterday... good hook.By the way, thanks for the great ideas! I've been hearing similar stories on other forums about the song's catchiness. Thanks for sharing that with me.

[kagedgurl]

I actually really like this song. If you're wanting to do something in the praise music industry, I think you have a good chance with this one. I really like the tone of your lead vocals. The male vocal just needs a bit more confidence. Know that the straight, clear tone is a wonderful thing and embrace it. Not everyone needs to sing like R.Kelly to be effective in their genre. You, definitely are incredibly effective in this style of music.I think the female vocalist paired with the male is good as well. I would like to hear that vocal a little further back in the mix though and maybe on a lower harmony. The harmony she is singing is very "typical" sounding for this type of song. I would challenge you to put her on a counter melody even and maybe add one other vocalist to do that melody with her. Things like that really truly have the ability to bring worship music to life. You don't want to sound like "every other worship song" out there. Get creative with your bgv's! The hook is there too. You did a great job on the chorus making it singable for an audience to enter into with you. I really like the simplicity of the chorus and I think others will too. You did a good job on this one. Good luck with it!!