Montage Rejected

[johnclavin]

My Taxi montage entry was rejected. It is called "Taxi Montage" I can't get past the screeners with anything.

[rnrmachine]

Hi John,

It didn't sound bad, the musicianship didn't sound bad either. But I think your biggest issues are... You used generic sounds and did nothing to them to make them your own. Such as, you didn't alter the drums in anyway. That is HUGE in any electronic song. If you are using the famed 808 etc... you do something to it that makes yours different. The bass is stiff as well, and I don't mean non realism stiff, I mean there isn't much "fat" to it. It sounds "generic" like a cheap piece of meat. Now, that does NOT mean you need new samples, it means you need a new approach to using them. Alter them, give them life by adding distortion or EQing them in a way that makes you feel more involved in the song. Try MANY FX!!!. Electronic music in any form might sound mechanical, that is part of the appeal for people that like it. BUT the songs still have a life of their own, even though it's completely machine like. The bass may throb, or punch, or drive... the drums may be subdued, or over bearing but they have been altered to give the song it's own flavor. The synth in your song sounded 100% preset... like when you open it up, that's the sound you first hear. All of this gave your song "beginner" appeal/flavor. Not that unmistakable "pro vibe" you get when you listen to someone that LOVES electronic and then makes a song that he would LOVE even if someone else made it. I have a feeling if someone else made this song you wouldn't give it the time of day.. and that shows. (not in a mean way, you just wouldn't like it, you would change the radio station in other words...)

Once you tie all these things together it's just a song going through the motions but not fooling anyone who cares... when I listen to the song it doesn't even sound like you love what you are doing. You're song "Lonely City" sounded more to me like you liked doing it. Although that song, at times, still sounded like you were going through the motions rather then actually loving it. Try to get a feeling going with what you are doing and convey it by making things your own.

Please take this as it is meant... 100% to help guide you from an outsiders point of view that wants to help you the best way he can. You obviously can play guitar, your mixes are balanced and sound well done. Maybe not pro but good enough for TV imho. GET MORE PASSION!!! and you will sail right passed people struggling and find yourself with people who have success. imho

"Weather or Not" was pretty cool, a good solid backing track, but it ended sort of lame. A soft build ending would still work even in a softer song like that. You obvious can do more "pro work," imho.. you just need to actually do it.

HTH and good luck in the future,

Rob

[johnclavin]

Thanks Rob for taking the time here. Your points are well taken.
I try to create passion with melody, but I notice over the past year that a lot of music that gets forwarded dosen't have much in the way of melody. I guess I need more passion in the rhythm section and the sounds playing the melody. (Dave W. pointed out to me recently that I had a good brooding theme, but not a good sound to play it. My old Telecaster was not brooding enough.)

John

[kitchensinkmusic]

I'm a newbie and not very experienced but I must say that the honest and insightful critique from Rob is priceless.
Best,