still love you hip/hop

[shana123]

first verse: I'm going crazy now, can't get you out of my mind, can't put your picture down, oh god my heart has gone blind, pre chorus: for all of these feelings that i still have, there only getting stronger and i am glad. chorus: oh babe i love you, with all of my heart, oh babe i love you, we can never part, cause the day that we do is the day that i'll die, cause that will be the day i'll take my own life. thats all i have so far if any one has some ideas please help this song is for for my love and father of my three kids. thank you for veiwing

[ciskokidd]

Hey Shana,

From what I read, you are probably pretty new to lyric writing. Unfortunately, almost every line you used is a cliche. I know this is for your special person and it may not matter too much in the end.

But hey, every lyricist starts out this way. I know I sure did. If you are interested in getting better at this, the great thing is that there is a wealth of great songwriting tools available now. I will recommend a few:

A rhyming dictionary

A thesaurus

Six Steps to Songwriting Success - The lyrics section is fantastic.

Writing Better Lyrics - Pat Pattison taught me so much and this book was invaluable

Short Cuts to Hit Songwriting - A fantastic creativity tool

Masterwriter Software - well worth the price if you can afford it

Best,

Cisco

[shana123]

thank you