On the right track for pop/rock?

[nick.moxsom]

Like your stuff, Ben.

Nice lyrics, nice chord sequences, and your melodies fit the genre you're writing in really well. Imho, if you work on production and get some live instruments in there, your demos will be great. If only there was a magic plug-in that made everything sound warm and human – a huMIDIfier maybe – that would be cool, wouldn't it? I reckon you have the makings of a successful pop writer and wish you continued luck.

Nice to meet you.
Nick

[billg1]

If you could just add a live sounding instrument or two these would be ready to roll imo. The auto-tune is a bit of a bummer for me personally, but it's so overdone it pop music today that I don't really think it's a problem.

[BenSpinSpace]

billg1, in that case do you think the new version of You Were Wrong is ready?

[billg1]

billg1, in that case do you think the new version of You Were Wrong is ready?

You know, that's like the $64,000 question! Truth is it would probably depend on who was listening to it and for what. I think it's a fine song. If I were your producer I would put more emphasis on crunchy guitars and less on the synth parts, I think that would create more energy . . . but that's just me & doesn't mean squat.

[Kolstad]

Ben, to me you seem to be in a spot where small things can make a big difference. It's just very hard to point those small things out, that can bring your music that "undeniable" quality. Sometimes it's all in the writing. Certain lyrics calls for stand out music, and vice versa, so in your case it may be more about keeping on perfecting the raw material (lyrics, music, arrangement), than perfecting a close to finished production.

I think of "You were wrong" as a "solid" pop/rock song, that maybe sounded a little 90'ies? The mix sounded a little dense IMO, maybe particularly in the mids. But what I really missed in this particular version was a little more ear candy, especially an instrumental hook or signature that would make the song more memorable and stand on it's own.

Sorry if I'm just babbling, I'm better at asking questions than providing answers, so I may not be of any constructive help.

[feaker66]

Ben

Next time post the lyrics for us please.

Cool tune.

I like her voice.

Really like the "you were right" part. Love when the gal has to say that:)

Nice meeting you

sincerely

Paul

[mhazani]

Hey Ben! Nice to see you on the forums!

On top of everything we've already discussed in private, I'm with songcabinet regarding the production. Oh, how I miss the days of productions in the vein of Duran Duran's "Ordinary World", with lush synth strings, shimmering acoustic guitars and omnipresent drums... The 90's were a good time to be a music fan:). But nowadays, pop/rock production is, in general, MORE: when it's sparse, it's sparse-r than ever before, and when it's loud and busy, IT'S LOUD AND BUSY.

Since you mentioned to me you wrote it as a possible pitch to a Kelly Clarkson-type artist, I'd say that's where you should go for production advice. Check out "My Life Would Suck Without You" or "Since U Been Gone" - both start with the trademark Dr. Luke straight 8th (or 16th) guitar line and a minimalistic drum machine, with no bass (Since U) or a hardly present one (My Life). The songs certainly evolve over time - a good rule of thumb is to never let 8 bars go by without some change - but the evolution is subtle and minimalistic until the chorus.

By starting out with obviously synthy strings, you've already taken yourself out of this decade, production-wise. The octaved-piano took you back another couple of years in production-era-years, and that's even before the chorus...

To me, the chorus is actually the one part that sounds as if it was written and produced in the last couple of years. Everything else suffers from post-80's, early-90's grandeur, an attempt at larger-than-lifeness that doesn't sound fresh anymore, because it was done to death.

Anyway, as I told you before, I really like the song, and I think it would benefit greatly from losing the piano altogether and the strings (except maybe the chorus).
Oh, and Kristen sounds awesome! Should have worked with her while still at Berklee:)

Take care, and good luck with your music,

Michael

(PS - sorry we didn't meet up... My shooting schedule ended up being hectic as hell, and I hardly had a moment to breathe. I also froze my you-know-what's in Santa Monica when the night shoots began:). Anyway, I'll send you a link to the commercial when the campaign airs, and I'll see you next time I'm in LA / you're in NYC!)