Mr. Small (Kinks/Beatles "Retro" Style)

[GlennPageMusic]

Q: What's the difference between "retro-hip cool" and "dated"?
A: Whether the person listening likes what they hear.



Hi taxi members. Some lyrics for you to tear apart.
Modelled after mid-60's Kinks and Beatles tunes in form and lyrical/musical content.
Feel free to be as vicious and ruthless as you want.


MR. SMALL


Verse 1:
I know a man who knows it all
He's not much more than three feet tall
He's always looking down
Even though he's on the ground
That's why they call him Mr. Small

Verse 2:
He's got a wife to call his own
He calls her lots of things at home
But in the real world
His voice is seldom heard
And so they call him Mr. Small

Bridge 1:
Living on a dead end street
Judging all the folks he meets
Even though he meets no one at all

Verse 3:
He wants to buy some real estate
As if somehow that compensates
He'll crawl into his hole
Where there should be a soul
And dwell on all the things he hates

Solo:
La la la la la la la la

Bridge 2:
Mr. Small, life ain't fair
No one seems to know you're there
And the world - they don't care at all

Verse 4:
He'll say that I'm not worth a damn
'Cause I don't make 100 grand
He might think I'm poor
But I've got so much more
Than Mr. Small can understand

Coda:
I'm trying hard to be a man
I'm happy just the way I am

by Glenn Page
http://www.youtube.com/user/PlaceSoFarA ... ture=watch

[PENKSLYRICS]

Hi GlennPageMusic

First of all I can definately hear a Beatles type tune when I read this.

I think the first two verses are well constructed then from the first bridge then it seems to go astray.
Personally I think the lack of the hook at the end makes the remaining verses sound unbalanced.
Also I think opening the second bridge with "Mr Small" also sounds unbalanced, a bit of a rewrite needed .

Just my thoughts, hope their helpful.

Roger

[GlennPageMusic]

Thanks Roger!

I see your point; my first instinct was to include the refrain at the end of every verse. However, it ended up starting to sound too sing-songy and "pat" to my ears.

So, to make up for the absence of "Mr. Small" in the third verse, I worked the title into the 2nd bridge. The variation, in my opinion, actually works better in practice than it might read on paper.

It's on youtube if you want to check (and you can endure my voice) and I'd be happy to hear if you still feel it needs to be changed.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y3N1glCoMdA


Thanks for reading and thanks for the suggestion.

G.