Get Away - Country, alt-country

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mikeShort
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Get Away - Country, alt-country

Post by mikeShort » Mon Mar 11, 2013 6:19 am

A light bit of fun. What do you think?

Get Away
by Michael B. Short © 2013

I see your Daddy's face behind the window pane
He wants to make sure you and I behave
He don't remember what it's like to be young
He sure don't want you having any fun
Let's take a drive around the neighborhood
Slide on over I promise I'll be good
Come on, Baby, what do you say
We gotta get away
Get away

Your Daddy looks at me like I'm a snake
Like he wants to grab my shirt and give me a shake
He doesn't trust a thing that I would do
He doesn't think I'm good enough for you
We gotta slip across that old state line
Find a road to leave the here and now behind
We don't even need a place to stay
We gotta get away
Get away

Bridge
What is with that man
I treat him with respect
I say yes sir I say no sir
He wants to grab me 'round the neck

He dated your Momma when he was 'bout my age
Maybe that's the source of all his rage
Did Daddy do some things he's not proud of
During his pursuit of life-long love
Maybe he remembers all too well
And thinks that I would do what he would never tell
I suppose he loves you but all the same
We gotta get away
Get away
Mike

"It's not bad. It's just not DONE."
The tall member of 2Late (http://www.2lateonline.com)

songmaster
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Re: Get Away - Country, alt-country

Post by songmaster » Wed Mar 13, 2013 8:07 am

Hi Mike I like this song very much. It kind of reminds my of Trisha Yearwoods song " She's In Love With The Boy ", only, from the boys perspective. The one line I noticed almost seems to repeat itself in the following line. " He don't remember what it's like to be young, He sure don't want you having any fun " I think when you say the first line " He don't remember what it's like to be young ", that it also means " and have fun " Also, I think he would want his daughter to have fun and be happy...just not with this guy. This second line might be a good place for some imagery. For example,

He don't remember what it's like to be young
I tried waving at him but he was waving his gun.

I like how you tied the song up at the end and how the father remembers how he was when he was young, and lets face it, no ones good enough for our daughters.

Anyway, just my two cents. It's a great song. All the best.

Tom.

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Re: Get Away - Country, alt-country

Post by simonsays » Thu Mar 14, 2013 11:51 pm

I like this one too Mike. I also think Songmaster made a good point. And I couldn't help but smile at the boy waving to the Dad's waving gun image. :D
Steve

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Re: Get Away - Country, alt-country

Post by nylyrics » Wed Mar 20, 2013 6:32 am

Mike:

Not an expert but i thought this after a couple reads:

Might be more fun if less harsh - like around the corner vs state line
And father worried vs rage

Also on the rhyme scheme when i started reading i thought it might come off better ABAB VS AABB in the start of the verse.

Overall alot of good images and you put us in the scene well. Good luck.

Andy

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