Feedback needed on song - pleassssss

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sguiles
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Re: Feedback needed on song - pleassssss

Post by sguiles » Sun Apr 27, 2014 4:51 pm

My one questions would be this: is there a style or artist you are shooting for with this song? Is there a Taxi ala that you are looking to emulate?

That could also help guide feedback you get, because without a target, it's hard to know if you "hit it". :)
But I'll agree with everyone else here too...this is a great sounding song! And I'd like to hear the piano more too, though the guitar is great as well. The harmonies and parts are really cool!

The electric guitar part sounds a little off compared to the rest of the production, so that's one area I'd want to change drastically.
Again, take ALL of our comments with a grain of salt. :)
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Oma
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Re: Feedback needed on song - pleassssss

Post by Oma » Mon Apr 28, 2014 1:49 am

Thanks a lot Tim, LRC and Steven. One thing I'm getting all through is that I need to work on the instrumentals a bit more, will re record the accoustic guits and will try substituting the electric guitars or playing a different tone, I'll see what works. The genre will most likely be contemporary christian. Thanks all, I really appreciate all the feedback.

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Re: Feedback needed on song - pleassssss

Post by songmaster » Mon Apr 28, 2014 6:03 am

Hi Oma

Just when you thought no one was going to talk about the lyrics :) Of course you can take this with a grain of salt. I think it is really a sweet song with lots of emotion. The production part, I don't have much experience to give any suggestions ( it gets across the feeling of the song ). Here's how I would write it and please, this is only a suggestion, but I feel it would make it a little more personal and hopefully stronger.

I've been travelling so long
Sometimes I wonder where I belong
This numbness and emptiness I feel
Makes this journey so unreal
I imagine warm gentle hands
Holding me, saying you'll be fine
I imagine joy and peace of mind

Yeah, he's gonna find me
And he's gonna love me
Somewhere in this world
The magic will happen
He's gonna find me

Anyway, it's just my 2 cents. When I hear a great song I can't help but get carried away. I wish you lots of luck with this one. It is great!!!

Tom.

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Re: Feedback needed on song - pleassssss

Post by Oma » Mon Apr 28, 2014 9:41 am

Hmmmm, thanks Tom, I like the spin you've put on this. Truth is I actually wrote the song as a prayer for someone quite close to me that was battling with addiction. But thanks anyway, will definitely consider this as I write some more.

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Re: Feedback needed on song - pleassssss

Post by songmaster » Tue Apr 29, 2014 6:16 am

I understand Oma, that shines a totally different light on it. Good luck with it and may it find a happy home. :)

Tom.

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