The Battle Cry

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TheFates
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Re: The Battle Cry

Post by TheFates » Thu May 07, 2015 1:26 pm

Hi Jolan,

Thanks for sharing! I vote for "I will stand in front not behind" for the second line and "So let bullets fly" for the third.

I really like the chorus though I would change "shot in the behind" to "shot from behind"

In Verse 2, I think the first two lines are redundant as you've already explained that you fight for what you believe in and how you choose to live your life.

Hope this helps!

Elizabeth
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TheFates
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Re: The Battle Cry

Post by TheFates » Thu May 07, 2015 1:40 pm

The song seems quite serious lyrically which is why "shot in the behind" seems out of place.
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the1lyricistmm
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Re: The Battle Cry

Post by the1lyricistmm » Thu May 14, 2015 5:18 am

Hmmm...how about:

I'll stand for what's right
So let the bullets fly
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