Uplifting folk songs listing return

[Coffeeinthesink]

I was a little bummed about this return but I took some solace in the fact that only two songs were forwarded (one from Braheny award winning Clark Van Norris). This style is a little less common for me from both a writing and a production level, but it's something I'm interested in doing more of. I'd love to hear any feedback on how this could have been better or closer to the listing:

https://soundcloud.com/david-zimmer-tlh/live-out-loud-1

The feedback that I received was:

You have a lot of room to strengthen the song emotionally.

(which stings a little) and also:

Your song didn't effectively set a tone or vibe that was right for the spot.

UPLIFTING, INSPIRING FOLK/SINGER-SONGWRITER SONGS with Male or Female Vocals are needed for an (up to) $40,000, Direct-to-Ad-Agency placement in a TV Commercial for a big company.

They’re looking for a Mid-to-Up-Tempo Song in the general stylistic wheelhouse of the following reference we got from them:

“Everything Is Possible Now” by Clouds and Thorns

NOTE: The Ad-Agency absolutely loves “Everything Is Possible Now” by Clouds and Thorns as an example of what could work in this Commercial. To be clear: They’re NOT looking for clones or soundalikes! Similar tempo, style, and overall vibe? Yes. Clones? No!

It's probably the anthemic, joyful proclamation of the best of humanity that resonates with this company's brand managers and the ad agency's creative team. "Aren't we lucky to be alive and loving life?" seems to be the implied message.

Most of this company's Commercials have a similar vibe and message; and it's notable that while all of the music they use is "feel good" in the melodies and lyrics, some of the tunes they've used in the past do NOT have super-slick productions. They clearly go for uplifting lyrical messages and a joyful spirit. They will use Songs with somewhat stripped-down arrangements and productions if the feeling and messages are on point!

That said, they did give us the reference, so that's likely your best clue. Other Songs they gave us that fit musically, but NOT lyrically are:

“Riptide” Vance Joy

“House of Gold” by twenty one pilots

Please give them well-crafted Folk/Singer-Songwriter Songs in the inspirational, uplifting style of the references and other Songs in that ballpark. Your submissions should have solid melodies with really uplifting choruses, coupled with great vocal performances. Your productions should have primarily acoustic-based instrumentation and should be rhythmically and melodically appealing from start to finish.

Using some group/gang vocals or some non-lyrical chants (“ooohs,” “yeahs,” “heys,” “woo-hoos,” etc.) could help give your Songs a more advertising-friendly sound; however, those are not necessary to land this – just a suggestion!

LYRIC TIP: Lyrically the Songs/concepts need to express either loving others (non-romantically), helping others, camaraderie, hope, inspiration, feeling good and/or anything else along those lines. Please avoid references to specific names, dates, times, brands, and profanity in your lyrics.


The estimated license fee is up to $40,000, depending on the ultimate use. This is a Direct-to-Ad-Agency pitch. You’ll keep all ownership of the Copyright and Master Recording, but you won’t be able to license your Song to any other TV Commercials for the duration of the term of the agreement, which will be determined by the Ad Agency and you.
TAXI #Y191217UP

[jaywilliams]

Hey David -

This isn't my genre but I do have ears so I've listened to the "Clouds and Thorns" reference track as well as your track.

I can certainly understand while you are bummed, as both tracks seem to be in the same general wheelhouse, with a lot of similarities between them!

Having said that, two things are standing out to me as significant differences - the energy level and the mix.

The energy level in the reference track is about half again as lively as yours.

And in terms of the mix, I'm hearing the vocals as much more prominent in yours, while the instrumentation and in particular the percussive elements are more prominent in the reference track.

In terms of lyrical theme, I'm on board with your hook/chorus, I think "Let's Live Out Loud" is the kind of uplifting message they are after. Your verses, on the other hand, seem a little more wistful to me. Thematically I think it would work better with more "forward facing" lyrics rather than the "I survived the journey" kind of theme in your track.

Someone more experienced in this genre may be able to offer more in the ways of specific tweaks.

TLDR- punch up the energy and punch up the positivity in your verses

Hope that helps, best of luck!

Jay

[cassmcentee]

Wonderful Tune!
First, clean up the click/pops at 0.00 to 0.01
I scrubbed it a couple of times to make sure that was what I heard...
That paused me from moving forward to listening to the verse.

The vocal does come in too loud for the first verse...
This, I'll bet, is what the Screener means by "...strengthen..." or better yet, develop
If you could track that again singing a bit more like you are singing into someone's ear
That will give you a better emotional transition into the first chorus (The Chorus is Wonderful!)
Could also give you a chance to pull a little bit of something out of the first chorus so that the second one feels more growth?

From then on it was great to listen to!
From my ears to yours...
Cass

[Casey H]

...for an (up to) $40,000, Direct-to-Ad-Agency placement in a TV Commercial for a big company.

One thing to keep in mind is when you see something like that in a listing, it tells you right away that the bar is INCREDIBLY high. Your song is reviewed in terms of the needs of a particular listing and not necessarily an island to itself. A song that might get forwarded for a number of library listings still may not meet the bar for a very high sync fee one.

Casey

[feaker66]

Fun upbeat song. Like your voice.

[Coffeeinthesink]

This is all really helpful Jay. Thank you very much! Are you saying the energy level in mine is higher or lower? I'm assuming you meant mine is lower but I'm not familiar with the expression half again. Thanks so much!

Hey David -

This isn't my genre but I do have ears so I've listened to the "Clouds and Thorns" reference track as well as your track.

I can certainly understand while you are bummed, as both tracks seem to be in the same general wheelhouse, with a lot of similarities between them!

Having said that, two things are standing out to me as significant differences - the energy level and the mix.

The energy level in the reference track is about half again as lively as yours.

And in terms of the mix, I'm hearing the vocals as much more prominent in yours, while the instrumentation and in particular the percussive elements are more prominent in the reference track.

In terms of lyrical theme, I'm on board with your hook/chorus, I think "Let's Live Out Loud" is the kind of uplifting message they are after. Your verses, on the other hand, seem a little more wistful to me. Thematically I think it would work better with more "forward facing" lyrics rather than the "I survived the journey" kind of theme in your track.

Someone more experienced in this genre may be able to offer more in the ways of specific tweaks.

TLDR- punch up the energy and punch up the positivity in your verses

Hope that helps, best of luck!

Jay

[Coffeeinthesink]

Great suggestions Cass. Much much appreciated! I agree that the vocals are coming in a little hot and the verses are more the concern with the song. I like the idea of making a little more dynamic change between the 1st and 2nd choruses. Thanks!

Wonderful Tune!
First, clean up the click/pops at 0.00 to 0.01
I scrubbed it a couple of times to make sure that was what I heard...
That paused me from moving forward to listening to the verse.

The vocal does come in too loud for the first verse...
This, I'll bet, is what the Screener means by "...strengthen..." or better yet, develop
If you could track that again singing a bit more like you are singing into someone's ear
That will give you a better emotional transition into the first chorus (The Chorus is Wonderful!)
Could also give you a chance to pull a little bit of something out of the first chorus so that the second one feels more growth?

From then on it was great to listen to!
From my ears to yours...
Cass

[Coffeeinthesink]

Thanks Casey it's so true. A friend suggested I try this one and I went in knowing I could spend a lot of time and still get returned. Nothing lost and I still have a nice song in the end.

...for an (up to) $40,000, Direct-to-Ad-Agency placement in a TV Commercial for a big company.

One thing to keep in mind is when you see something like that in a listing, it tells you right away that the bar is INCREDIBLY high. Your song is reviewed in terms of the needs of a particular listing and not necessarily an island to itself. A song that might get forwarded for a number of library listings still may not meet the bar for a very high sync fee one.

Casey

[eeoo]

Hey David - It seems like a really strong effort to me and even though it's a high bar listing I'm surprised it didn't get through. Bright side is now you have a tune that's sure to find a good home somewhere. Have you listened to what got forwarded for this listing?

[jaywilliams]

This is all really helpful Jay. Thank you very much! Are you saying the energy level in mine is higher or lower? I'm assuming you meant mine is lower but I'm not familiar with the expression half again. Thanks so much!

Hey David -

Correct.

"half again" meaning - take the energy level from your track, add 50% more energy, and that's what I'm hearing in the reference track.

I think it's to do with the mix, the beat/percussion is more prominent in the reference track which gives it that extra energetic feel.

Great track, best of luck with it!

Jay