verse or chorus

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JannieM
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verse or chorus

Post by JannieM » Wed Apr 01, 2020 2:39 am

This little lyric popped into my head when I was half asleep this morning.

"Why does it take
a catastrophe
for us to be
kinder to each other"

What do you think fits this lyric more - as a verse OR as a chorus ?

Thoughts please!

Jan
Use your voice for kindness, your ears for compassion, your hands for charity, your mind for truth, and your heart for love. ~ ~ ~ ~ Author Unknown

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funsongs
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Re: verse or chorus

Post by funsongs » Wed Apr 01, 2020 8:33 am

JannieM wrote:
Wed Apr 01, 2020 2:39 am
This little lyric popped into my head when I was half asleep this morning.

"Why does it take
a catastrophe
for us to be
kinder to each other"

What do you think fits this lyric more - as a verse OR as a chorus ?

Thoughts please!

Jan
Putting on my "Robin Frederick hat" - WWRS (What Would Robin Say?) - good to ask a question: probably early, and in Verse, to set up your answer/payoff in the Chorus.
So - I think you have the first Verse there.
And - the payoff line in the Chorus ought to be in the title. If you come up with your solution/message to the question - you'll be well on your way to having a proper-good song.
Just an opinion - want help with it? Or do you wanna complete the thought on your own?
Cheers.
Peter Rahill - aka "funsongs"
https://soundcloud.com/funsongs-1
You Tube channel: Peter Rahill

“The future aint what it use to be.” - Yogi Berra

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cosmicdolphin
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Re: verse or chorus

Post by cosmicdolphin » Wed Apr 01, 2020 2:12 pm

MIddle 8

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funsongs
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Re: verse or chorus

Post by funsongs » Wed Apr 01, 2020 3:09 pm

JannieM wrote:
Wed Apr 01, 2020 2:39 am
This little lyric popped into my head when I was half asleep this morning.

"Why does it take
a catastrophe
for us to be
kinder to each other"

What do you think fits this lyric more - as a verse OR as a chorus ?

Thoughts please!

Jan
Middle 8 - aka, as a Bridge - could certainly work just as well.
+1
Peter Rahill - aka "funsongs"
https://soundcloud.com/funsongs-1
You Tube channel: Peter Rahill

“The future aint what it use to be.” - Yogi Berra

JannieM
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Re: verse or chorus

Post by JannieM » Wed Apr 01, 2020 6:39 pm

Thanks for your responses. For the moment, I think I will keep stirring some ideas around and see what bakes - cookies or cakes.

Good possibility this lyric becomes a bridge.

Jan
Use your voice for kindness, your ears for compassion, your hands for charity, your mind for truth, and your heart for love. ~ ~ ~ ~ Author Unknown

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Re: verse or chorus

Post by cconfident » Sun Apr 12, 2020 2:01 pm

Sounds like a good pre-chorus leading up to the punch! :)

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AlanHall
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Re: verse or chorus

Post by AlanHall » Mon Apr 13, 2020 1:16 pm

For me it could be either: it depends entirely where the song is going.
As an opening verse, I can hear a plaintive voice asking this, then follow with a bigger protest/ social criticism kind of piece.
On the other hand, if the verses were "today I saw <somebody doing something nice for somebody>" then the chorus (or bridge, good bridge!) would fit well with the lyric you wrote. This use gives me the sense of a much more positive, encouraging song. Wistful, yes. Sad, maybe. But hopeful and positive.

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