dramedy feedback please and thank you!

[irthlingz]

edited version:


initial version:
https://soundcloud.com/user-171442525/s ... -irthlingz

How can we improve this?

Thanks! Sharon & Michael

===

ORCHESTRAL DRAMEDY INSTRUMENTAL CUES are needed by a Music Licensing Company with a HUGE list of placements in Films, TV Commercials, and A-List TV Shows.

NOTE: This Company has signed lots of TAXI members over many years and nailed down lots of placements for them!

This Company is looking for Instrumental Cues that could be found on a playlist with the following references:

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (From 0:59 - 1:55) - https://youtu.be/x4XWN5cohTY?t=59

RHOSLC Highlights S1 Ep6 (From 1:35 - 2:00) - https://youtu.be/9vnwMR-VCKo?t=95

"Sneaky Snitch" by Kevin MacLeod - https://youtu.be/l3_Fh24AGBE

Please submit well-produced Instrumental Cues that set the tone for quirky, light, dramatic scenes in Reality TV shows. Your submissions should have solid motifs and high-quality Orchestral instrumentation. Please craft your Cues around a singular motif and mood, and create a sense of dynamics and forward momentum by layering instrumentation in and out as they progress. Be sure to avoid submitting anything that sounds too busy, as it could interfere with a scene’s dialog. Your production should be polished and any virtual instruments or samples you use need to be top-notch.

Submissions should be about 2 minutes long, give or take, and have non-faded, buttoned/stinger endings. Do NOT copy the references in any way, shape, or form. Use them only as a general guide for tempo, tone, and overall vibe. Broadcast Quality is needed.

This company offers an EXCLUSIVE deal. You’ll split all upfront sync fees 50/50. They’ll get 100% of the Publisher’s share, and you’ll keep 100% of the Writer’s share. You must own or control your Master and Copyright. Since this is an EXCLUSIVE deal, please be sure the material you submit for this pitch is NOT already signed with other Libraries or Catalogs. Please send as many Instrumental Cues as you’d like, online or per CD. All submissions will be screened and critiqued by TAXI. All Submissions must be received no later than 11:59 PM (PDT) on Tuesday, April 19th, 2022. TAXI # S220419DD

[Cale]

You may have a 'less is more/not close enough to the references' critique headed your way. You want to set a mood and not get in the way of any dialogue, so you could consider dialing back that bass - leave some space. Lots of drums here, unlike the references so that will probably come up in the critique as well. Also, an organ isn't typically heard in this genre. You could experiment swapping that (and the piano) out with marimba, vibes, etc...

Can you tell me how you got your entire track to show up from SoundCloud? I can only seem to post a link.

Thanks, and good luck with your track!

[irthlingz]

Thank you, Cale! Great feedback. New edited version in first post:
- substitutes marimba for piano
- dials down the bass
- dials down the percussion
- eliminates the organ

On the SoundCloud question, insert the link that you copy from SoundCloud, select the link text and click on the orange soundcloud icon in the icon bar (second from the right in the lower bar above the editing window). This will insert "soundcloud" in square brackets before the link and "/soundcloud" in square brackets after the link, and when you Preview or Submit your post, you should see the same type of thing as in the first post here. The SoundCloud track probably has to be public.

Thanks again for taking the time to help us!

===
Sharon & Michael

[VanderBoegh]

Hey Sharon & Michael - couple of things here:

1) There's nothing really to latch on to here in terms of melody of cohesion. This piece seems to be suffering from a case of multiple personalities, haha, as it's kinda all over the place. Elements come and go without much reason - like the hip hop drums at :11 which are only present for a few bars before they disappear entirely. Then you'v e gove got shuffling rock drums that enter at :44 and disappear after a few bars. Then claps at 1:22 that clap about 6-8 times then are gone....

2) You're using a LOT of reverb in this piece, and not all of it is uniform throughout. Sounds like your orchestra is playing to an empty indoor arena. Tighten up that reverb so this sounds like you're sitting in the front row of a much smaller venue.

3) You end with a modulation which doesn't appear anywhere else in the piece (see point #1 above). Which really throws this cue in a different direction at the very end.

4) Lastly, there's really no "mood" to latch on to here. Always think in terms of mood.... if you had to categorize this piece with three moods (which you'll invariably have to do when you start signing music to libraries), what would you pick? And do you think the average listener would choose the same moods?

~~Matt

[CTWF]

Hey Michael

I agree with everything Matt wrote - and thought along those lines already with the first version (had no time to write). One small thing to add: The marimba which can be well heard from 01:06 onwards seems to be in a different room reverb-wise. It therefore feels out of place, so, I would align the melody instruments more with respect to reverb.

EDIT: I just saw Matt's "uniform" comment - I think that might have been one of the things he meant with that.

Tom

[irthlingz]

Matt -

Thank you for taking the time for such thoughtful and detailed comments.

Our favorite part is when you start signing music to libraries !!!

But the other things are really helpful and useful, too!

Many thanks,
Sharon & Michael

[irthlingz]

Hey Michael

I agree with everything Matt wrote - and thought along those lines already with the first version (had no time to write). One small thing to add : The marimba which can be well heard from 01:06 onwards seems to be in a different room reverb-wise. It therefore feels out of place, so, I would align the melody instruments more with respect to reverb.

EDIT: I just saw Matt's "uniform" comment - I think that might have been one things he meant with that.

Tom

Thank you, Tom! Great to have specifics like that to pursue!

===
Sharon & Michael

[irthlingz]

Question: Can the "mood" thing be addressed without a complete rewrite??? In other words, can this be addressed with arranging/mix/production, or is it about being better composers? Thanks!

[CTWF]

Question: Can the "mood" thing be addressed without a complete rewrite??? In other words, can this be addressed with arranging/mix/production, or is it about being better composers? Thanks!

I think a strong recurring theme/hook will define the mood and keep it fairly consistent. I guess it also all depends on what you consider a complete rewrite.

[cosmicdolphin]

Question: Can the "mood" thing be addressed without a complete rewrite???

Not IMHO

In other words, can this be addressed with arranging/mix/production,

That's only part of the issue

or is it about being better composers?

100% yes

Thanks!

Welcome.

You've had some great advice from seasoned pro's here. I struggled to listen to it all the through as it was a bit of a dogs breakfast. Just like someone had thrown a load of stuff against the wall and hoped something stuck.

The first time I attempted a dramedy cue I completely sucked and it was one of the rare occassions I listened back to to a cue the next day and just dropped the whole project into the trash.

I didn't try again for a couple of years but when I did I took a complete different approach. What I did was reverse engineered the reference track and actually re-made ( as in copied ) an 8 bar section of it.

I found instruments of my own that sounded as close to theirs as I had. I set my DAW tempo to exacly match the reference. Then I set about picking out each instrument with active listening until I could play along that 8 bar section pretty much exactly and recorded my own version. By the end of the session I had a pretty close facsimile of those 8 bars and my own track sounded like a well made dramedy cue even if it wasn't my own.

What this did was teach me some important lessons about what instruments worked well together, how they were played, the types of note patterns , how the arrangemt slotted together. Once I had that template figured out I wiped the midi notes and wrote new parts that were simiiar but of my own design - new melodies, different chords, key etc. But it still sounded like a proper cue as I'd stolen all the arrangement ideas from a high quality reference.

That cue was accepted by the library and has been placed multiple times.