Repetitive Lyrics

[lopc]

How did I miss this pearl? Reading it and singing it, it got my head noddin' so quick I almost threw my neck out. (I threw in a coupla new words the second time around and the nonsensical stuff is guitar wailing or something else going on)You've got me dancin for youyeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah- (nonsensical stuff)You've got me head over heels yeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahYou've got me fading from viewyeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahI'm fading I don't know why.....You know how to crucify............Yeah, baby, how to crucify........Hey, maybe call it Crucify. Maybe not. Hell, I think it is cool.

[matto]

Quote:I was thinking about this thread this morning as Carrie Underwood was playing on the radio...[(c) Chris Tompkins, Josh Kear 2005]Right now he's probably slow dancing with a bleach blonde tramp,and she's probably getting frisky...right now, he's probably buying her some fruity little drinkcause she can't shoot whiskey...Right now, he's probably up behind her with a pool-stick,showing her how to shoot a combo...And he don't know...second verse is the same.In other words, don't sweat repetition - if it works, work it That's true...certainly nothing wrong with repetition...not in pop music anyway. Although in this lyric...it's worth noting how cool and descriptive and interesting the rest of the lines are.In your example Lindsey I wouldn't worry about the repetition, but I would probably throw out the old "head over heels" cliche.

[lopc]

I can't let it go, Lindsey, it's eatin' me alive! I love the possibility of this! One more hit......You've got me dancin for youyeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah- (nonsensical stuff)You've got me head over heels yeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahYou've got me fading from viewyeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahAnd I can't stand how it feelsYou got me dancing dancing Dancing for youMy God can't you feel it!!!!!!!! Whoooooooooooo! Rock on you English Frenchie! Whooooo!!!

[lopc]

dammit. Think I threw my neck out that time. What the heck, one more time, I'll just move my toes around and wiggle my fingers-You've got me dancin for youyeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah- (nonsensical stuff)You've got me head over heels yeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahYou've got me fading from viewyeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahAnd I can't stand how it feelsYou got me dancing dancing babyGot me dancing for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!dammit. I hurt my toes and my fingers. I love this work. Truly. It is a rocker and a winner!

[lopc]

Go for it.

[tomaragon]

I'd say you're fine.Journey's song Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin' has the word "Na" repeated 154 times for the last minute and 40 seconds of the song.........It's got to be some sort of record for most repeated word in a song IMHO .

[linziellen]

Hahaha, thank you everyone but sorry lopc - about your neck an all! What's funny is that this was a pure example of the original verse I had written, so I thought now I may as well fire this at you. Don't be disappointed if it doesn't have the same charm, I could always scrap it and work with what seems to be working for you!Here...You got me eatin out the palm of your handYou got me beatin on the drum of the bandYou got me doin things I don't understandYou got me fallin baby where will I landYou got me walkin over hot coals of fireYou got me burnin up in heat and desireYou got me takin chances I never tookYou got me singin baby my records stuck.....I know I missed out loads of "g's" there but I don't need em in this song! Also the rhyming scheme is not equal.Has it lost it's charm? Should I revert back to my "example" ?Thanks very muchly.Lindsey

[Casey H]

They say repetition is everything in pop music, especially with respect to the hook line.It's hard sometimes to review lyrics without music... this is a good example. On read, my first reaction would be to not use "You've Got Me" in every line unless that was the title and focus of the song. I'm assuming we are talking current pop, so Dylan's "A Hard Rain's Gonna Fall", sheer greatness, doesn't apply. However, with music, this might be great. So much depends on that IMHO... So, if it works with the music and the hook still shines with people walking away singing it, don't sweat it.While reading your lyrics, Melissa Etheridge popped into my head:But I'm the only oneWho'll walk across the fire for youI'm the only oneWho'll drown in my desire for youIt's only fear that makes you runThe demons that you're hiding fromWhen all your promises are goneI'm the only oneAbove she talks about all she would do for him but always comes back to the hook line, "I'm the only one"... She only repeats "Who'll" twice but conceptually (probably even if there were more repeats of it) it works fine because it supports the hook line so well.andI would dial the numbersJust to listen to your breathI would stand inside my hellAnd hold the hand of deathYou don't know how far I'd goTo ease this precious acheYou don't know how much I'd giveOr how much I can takeShe is masterful at describing how she feels toward the other person...My take would be get it going with some music and see how it feels. See if a few "you got me" lines work with the hook... Casey

[Mark Kaufman]

Repetition is one of the most recognizable aspects of music as we know it. We repeat the chorus, the title, the hook. We repeat chord patterns. Very few songs are "through-composed" and even those often repeat an idea before moving on to the next.So if you are clever about a consciously written series of repetitions, you're really just being very musical. It will all come down to whether it "works" or not...but the concept is just fine.

[lopc]

First time I ever heard Mellancamp's "Small Town" I caught myself thinking what the heck through the 1st verse/verses? Then the chorus eventually came around and I thought okay, good job. Then the chorus ended and the verses came back in a slower more laid back tone and I thought, what the heck? but then the chorus came back around and I thought..........For what it is worth, I still like the original.