Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedback!

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nick.moxsom
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Re: Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedb

Post by nick.moxsom » Mon Feb 03, 2014 12:49 pm

That's awesome!

There can't be anything more exciting than having the artist of your choice not only hear, but love your song. My fingers are crossed for you, dude, this is a great song.

Nick

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Re: Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedb

Post by StevenRedig » Mon Feb 03, 2014 9:12 pm

That's really really great! I can't imagine you NEED to improve Anything to sell that song. Seriously. But I think we all know that.

I was wondering if there is something in the rhythm that seems to not be totally locking with the vocal? Probably just me. I feel like I am off, just a hair, in a few places. I really like the arrangement. It just feels like there is a little looseness or something between the voice and the rest. Very, very miniscule. The excellence of the song and your voice completely overshadows anything else.

I will be expecting to hear this on the radio! Thanks for sharing

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Re: Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedb

Post by bobporri » Sun Feb 09, 2014 1:46 pm

Alvin,

Awesome song and performance. I wasn't really trying to listen for the specifics of what the other's valuable comments pointed out, just taking the song in as a whole. All smiles here while listening. I know about dry spells. Take advantage of momentum whenever you can. Best of luck with this.

Bob P.

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Re: Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedb

Post by DesireInspires » Sun Feb 16, 2014 6:23 pm

Good stuff. Keep moving forward.

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Re: Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedb

Post by Vthov » Wed Feb 19, 2014 6:16 pm

LittleRedChurch wrote:What a great song! That chorus just sucked me in... MOVED me!!! Wow. An honour listening.

Little things to me... The strings at the 1:30 mark? Jarring.
Voice is SOOOOO strong and good!!! in the chorus'. To me it's a little unsure in the verses. I only say that because the voice in the chorus is so strong! In the verses and pre-chorus, it's a pitch and power thing. To me!!!! I'd use pitch correct or some variation there of, at about 66... lol If that means anything to you... (I'm a master of pitch correction and all the additional tools associated with ahem... character over pitch perfect, singing... :? ) You're just so trumpet strong in the chorus'. Love that power.

Cool's right about the kick drum, too. Little boomy - verby.

LOVED this!!! Honour...

LRC
Ok I fine tuned the pitch I'd love for you to put your ears on it LRC. http://taxi.com/vthov The song is War Cry, just in case you forgot.

nick.moxsom
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Re: Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedb

Post by nick.moxsom » Fri Feb 21, 2014 6:03 pm

Well, I've gotta be honest and say, while this was a valiant attempt, I prefer the original. You had such a Cee Lo vibe in the first version. I can hear it more as a john Legend song now, but I think you've got the chops without pitch correction.

Still hopeful it'll come through for ya.

Nick

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Re: Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedb

Post by nick.moxsom » Fri Feb 21, 2014 6:03 pm

Apologies for the repeat. Internet latency.
Last edited by nick.moxsom on Sat Feb 22, 2014 5:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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LittleRedChurch
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Re: Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedb

Post by LittleRedChurch » Fri Feb 21, 2014 11:30 pm

Man this is a great song!! Don't put pressure on ME to make suggestions that are actually VALID!!! hmmmm. but if I MUST!!! Let's see. Love love love this song. I think the verse is better! BUT, maybe the tuning is a bit extreme. Scale back a touch??

My thing about the verse too, was the tone of the voice. You belt in the chorus and kinda hold back in the verses. That's good, nay, great, but to the point where it ALMOST sounds like a falsetto in the verse and head voice - or whatever that's called - in the chorus. Could you re-sing with head voice throughout?? Just soften the verse. Don't lose the soul that the chorus delivers in spades. It does sound a little mechanical in the verse right now - to me - though again, I think it's better than what was. That'd be a sign of a tad too much auto tune. Says the auto tune King.

I know nothing about anything... in case you're wondering how seriously to take my suggestions...

Sincerely

King Auto Tune

aka Little Red Church

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Re: Returns had me discouraged… but now I'm back, need feedb

Post by cassmcentee » Sat Feb 22, 2014 12:35 am

Oh Yeah! Beautiful Tune!
Robert "Cass" McEntee
"Making music on a spinning ball of Magma"
https://soundcloud.com/robert-cass-mcentee
https://www.taxi.com/members/DosPalmasRecordings

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