Sweet Karen - New song, please critique

[rockmann]

Hi folks,Looking forward to comments on this new song. This one is a bit on the melow side.... a bit different for us. I'm wondering if we're pulling it off?http://www.soundclick.com/util/streamm3 ... rics:Sweet KarenWords by Steve M. Mann 7/14/06Performed by Project-43: http://www.project-43.com/Your absence makes me a captain without a shipA boat floating adriftSince you've gone I’m a gambler with no moneyA clown that isn't funnyWithout you I’m a partner that is all aloneA jeweler without a stoneNow that you've left me, I suffer from a syndromeA house that’s not a home[Chorus]Seems like forever you've been goneCome back, sweet Karen – Without you I’m not the sameSeems like forever you've been goneCome back, sweet Karen - I know it’s me who’s to blameLittle more than an astronaut without a rocketA Kiss with no chocolateI’m as useful as a guitar without its stringsA Robin that cannot singIt’s me without you, a chart without graphsA comedy with no laughsWithout you I’m a face without a smileEmotions lost in exile[Chorus]Seems like forever you've been goneCome back, sweet Karen – Without you I’m not the sameSeems like forever you've been goneCome back, sweet Karen - I know it’s me who’s to blameYears gone by, like a pilot without his navigatorA fancy dish without the flavorSome deep sea diver without his lifelineA city with no skyline[Chorus]Seems like forever you've been goneCome back, sweet Karen – Without you I’m not the sameSeems like forever you've been goneCome back, sweet Karen - I know it’s me who’s to blame=====================Thanks in advance for listening and taking the time to comment.