The Budgie Song

[johnnydean1]

i wrote this when I was on tour in Australia recently.Aaron Authier,please critique.The Budgie SongThere once was a budgie called freakyWho had a very sharp beakyOne day in his cageHe flew into a rageAnd now he's a little bit leaky

[johnnydean1]

Come on folks!!!!!!This has been up 10 minutes already and still no response. Is the syllable count right.Are there any redundant words.Does it sing to you.Is it tweet.

[momof4]

pretty funny, johnny! "is it tweet"...oh, spare us!

[momof4]

p.s. i think i saw some redundant birds...er...WORDS...kidding. couldn't resist!

[johnnydean1]

Quote:pretty funny, johnny! "is it tweet"...oh, spare us! Funny!!!!!??????

[linziellen]

Come on folks!!!!!!This has been up 10 minutes already and still no response. I was waiting for the second half about the day he got out of his cage and hit the fan (where's the little devil face)? Great lyric, reminds me of a few of my own Lindsey

[lopc]

Nice limerick.

[johnnydean1]

Quote:i wrote this when I was on tour in Australia recently.Aaron Authier,please critique.The Budgie SongThere once was a budgie called freakyWho had a very sharp beakyOne day in his cageHe flew into a rageAnd now he's a little bit leakyontario aka aaron arserI am the only person on the board that recognized your immense talent and gift for song critique,so much so I immediately asked you to comment on my Budgie Song.You said you had better things to do and evaded my request.Would you stop pulling your love muscle for two minutes and comment on my Budgie Song Please!!!!

[liamkelly]

Quote:Quote:i wrote this when I was on tour in Australia recently.Aaron Authier,please critique.The Budgie SongThere once was a budgie called freakyWho had a very sharp beakyOne day in his cageHe flew into a rageAnd now he's a little bit leakyontario aka aaron arserI am the only person on the board that recognized your immense talent and gift for song critique,so much so I immediately asked you to comment on my Budgie Song.You said you had better things to do and evaded my request.Would you stop pulling your love muscle for two minutes and comment on my Budgie Song Please!!!!JD1It's not bad at all. The meter is somehow familiar to me but I can't quite put my finger on it. I do think you should've called the budgie 'Russell' though. Then you'd've got the 'love muscle' rhyme in. And that would've been very good Liam

[johnnydean1]

Quote:Quote:ontario aka aaron arserI am the only person on the board that recognized your immense talent and gift for song critique,so much so I immediately asked you to comment on my Budgie Song.You said you had better things to do and evaded my request.Would you stop pulling your love muscle for two minutes and comment on my Budgie Song Please!!!!JD1It's not bad at all. The meter is somehow familiar to me but I can't quite put my finger on it. I do think you should've called the budgie 'Russell' though. Then you'd've got the 'love muscle' rhyme in. And that would've been very good LiamThanks Liam,interested in a co-write? The meter I.ve used is named after a place called Dublin or Cork or somewhere like that.