the dreaded word " dated"

[pegprod]

I got a couple listing feedbacks implying that my submission song "Blend" was dated . I'm confused as to what part of it is dated; i.e my vocal style, lyrics, the instrumention, the mix effects etc? . It was for a americana folky alt country type listing. Would appreciate any kind feedback. Thanks ,Peggy

http://www.taximusic.com/hosting/songs.php?userid=50727
https://soundcloud.com/peggy-lea-keuler/blend-1

[feaker66]

Hey Peg Nice to meet you Like your voice. Got a few off notes when you say "you've go nuthin to prove" I think it was about 1;28-30 ish. Threw me off a bit because the rest is good:)

Prechorus could be a little stronger. I might try taking a little reverb off your vocal to make it a little more intimate. I can't hear dated at all, but I am 66 years old and already very dated. ha ha

The guitar, percussion etc, to me was good. Don't be discouraged, you have plenty of talent. There are tons of folks at the Rallu and maybe you can get one of the truly skilled guru's to help you more.

Sincerely

Paul

[Paulie]

At the Rally I've heard that screeners are not supposed to be that vague, and specifically not to use the term "dated." It could be anything, the song style, the voice, the arrangement, the mix. Listening to your track the mix is a little off; the vocal is back, the guitar is heavy in the front and a little muddy. The bass drum sometimes seems too loud as well. There are some pitch problems in the chorus, such as at 0:40 when you say "Nothin' to prove" it needs to be cleaned up a bit, along with some of the larger vocal leaps like "join the crowd." I might be dating myself, but the first a la I felt was an older Tanya Tucker style, confident woman vive. I think with some tweaks and mixing changes you can have a good track here. Hope this is the sort of feedback you are looking for.

[Kolstad]

Can't believe if you haven't been dated before, you sound great
Especially the lyric was clever, and very well written imo.

On how to approach the musical arrangement in these times, you could get a lot of tips in Robin Frederick's book "Shortcuts to hit songwriting".
If I listen from that perspective, there are some "dating" elements in the music. To name two obvious ones:

- phrases are too predictable and generic to the chords
- the space between sections are not taken advantage of, to hold the listeners interest
- the melody structure is somewhat linear, and lack dynamics

Read that book, and follow the advice. You will get a lot more grip on how to work a lyric into a contemporary style, I'm sure.

Your writing and performance skills are solid, imo. But you need to work with style and arrangement to sound more contemporary or at least, retro.

[pegprod]

Thanks so much to all the repliers so far. Each one is great advice and mostly easy fixes. I like easy!! . So grateful for all the willing good ears on this site. I feel I so often overlook the obvious working alone. Peggy

[andygabrys]

Hi - if you posted the text of the listings that you submitted this song for and the screener's comments it would be easier to guess at what the screener meant by "dated"

as what is "dated" is always relative to the example (a la) tracks that are mentioned in the listings. Without that info, any feedback is shooting in the dark other than "nice job!" (and its a nice track).

generally what you mentioned "vocal style, lyrics, the instrumentation, the mix effects etc" are the usual suspects for what is dated (or could be dated). Add phrase lengths, lyric rhythm, the actual voice of the singer and you have a pretty comprehensive list.

[pegprod]

per request here's the exact 2 critiques with the listings, Peggy

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
submission one

Note: This is not a full critique. Y Listings are judged on a Yes/No basis, but we want to let you know the reason this song wasn't forwarded.

Name peggy ...... Listing # Y150828IF
Title: Blend

listener # 339

over-all execution of the song was lacking innovation of melodic hooks - the style was dated.



EMOTIONALY UPBEAT, ACOUSTIC-BASED INDIE FOLK SONGS with Male or Female Vocals are needed by a Top-Tier Music Licensing Company with a seemingly endless list of high-end placements in Film, TV, and Commercials. They're looking for solid, Mid-to-Up-Tempo Songs in the general stylistic wheelhouse of acts like Of Monsters and Men, The Lumineers, Mumford and Sons, etc., etc., etc. Please submit well-crafted Songs that sound like an authentic and current Indie Folk act, with acoustic instrumentation, and a solid, captivating vocal performance. Great vocal harmonies might give you an edge for this pitch, but they're not absolutely necessary. Songs should have emotionally uplifting melodies, with ear-grabbing hooks in all sections of the song, and a really compelling, uplifting chorus. Lyric themes can vary, but should be positive and universal, so please avoid specific names, places, dates, times, and brands. Do NOT copy or rip off the referenced artists in any way, shape, or form. Use them only as a general guide for feel, texture, tone, and vibe. Broadcast quality is needed (great sounding home recordings are fine). They're looking for songs with lyrics at this time, but they may be interested in an instrumental version if they sign your song(s), so please have a mix-minus vocal on hand. This company offers an EXCLUSIVE deal, so please be sure the songs you pitch for this listing are NOT already signed with any other Libraries or Publishers. Any sync fees will be split 50/50 with the Company. You'll get 100% of the Writer's share, and the Publisher will get 100% of the Publisher's share. You must own or control your Master and Copyright to submit. Please submit one to three Songs online or per CD, include lyrics. All submissions will be screened on a Yes/No basis by a TAXI screener handpicked by the Company - No full critiques. Submissions must be received no later than 11:59PM (PDT), on Friday, August 28, 2015. TAXI #Y150828IF

---------------------------------
submission two

Name peggy ..... Listing # S150807AM
Title: Blend
listener 312

Cool vibe, expressive vocals and nice musicianship. Style isn't quite similar to the specific needs of this listing and lacks a current, marketable quality needed for this artist.


S150807AM

CONTEMPORARY AMERICANA SONGS with Female Vocals are needed by the VP of A&R at a Major Record Label for a truly talented young act working on a brand new record. They want genre-bending, well-crafted, Mid-Tempo Songs that would appeal to the fans of acts like Romi Mayes, Baskery, Abalone Dots, etc., etc., etc. Please submit songs that are rhythmically and melodically compelling from beginning to end. If you blur the lines between Americana, Alt Americana, contemporary Country and Indie Folk, you're in the ballpark of what would appeal to this act. They're definitely genre-benders and blenders, and the end result has a cool factor that would appeal to radio and the mainstream audience. Some of their songs sound like Mumford and Sons got married to AbbaÉ imagine that! You'd be smart to have a really solid vocal performance to make it easy for the act to get excited about cutting your song. Engaging vocal harmonies will work really well for this pitch. Lyric themes can vary, but should be creative and have commercial appeal. Your recording quality needs to be clean, clear, well balanced, and good enough to represent your song well. Please submit one to three Songs online or per CD, include lyrics. All submissions will be screened and critiqued by a TAXI screener handpicked by the Label and must be received no later than 11:59PM (PDT), on Friday, August 7, 2015. TAXI #S150807AM

[funsongs]

I thought this was gonna be a thread from some guy with his sights set on meeting up
with Taylor Swift!

[Casey H]

Yea, Taylor Swift is definitely very dated.

[pegprod]

funsongs and Casey ; So i was thinking oh maybe it sounds like 1989 and then i was like duh... oh, i just got the joke