Being Deliberate

[philschon]

I like that too. Goals are now in my sig

[rayzer]

<Rayzer stumbles in>Hey deliberate bunch. How was your month?Mine was a little worse than I had hoped, but I’m still here.The auditors are still at work and will be through the first week in May.I’m prioritizing and surviving by doing everything in order of importance.An unexpected wrinkle in the month came from the biopsy of a ‘mole’ my wife had removed. It turned out to be melanoma that was deep enough to warrant a wide re-excision of the site and a sentinel lymph node biopsy. Man, they took a big chunk out of her arm. She is currently stitched up with 32 large black stitches sealing up the 6 inches of incisions on the top of her arm.Waiting for the results of the lymph node biopsy seemed to take forever. In reality it was 3 days. We spent a lot of time praying for peace and healing, while hoping for the best and planning for the worst. We’re starting to see how God doesn’t always take you out of bad situations, but stays with you and helps you through them. Honestly, it would really stink to go through the next steps of removing the rest of her lymph nodes and some sort of chemo/radiation, but we were getting ready to accept the results of the biopsy, whatever they said.Well, last Thursday we received the good news that her lymph nodes were clean! How awesome is that? I think my wife’s uncle said it best when he said that, “God would have been just as good, faithful, and loving if the biopsy showed more cancer, but how can we not praise Him for letting the results go the way they did?” You said it!Anyway…work and home filled my time and emotions to overflowing. I didn’t have the time or energy to be very deliberate this past month, but I had some great titles, hooks, song ideas, and melodies invading my brain anyway. I had my mini recorder and notebook to make notes for later, but that was all I did.Oh, Ted, I did hear your Nashville song. Nice. I’m so excited for your move and all that will be. ArkJack, April 15 is almost over! Your TurboTax song is still on my ‘to do’ list.So, what about next month? My main goal is to keep getting up each morning and every time something else knocks me down. Like today—both of our cars started running rough and had their ‘check engine’ lights come on. What’s the deal with that? I’ll be hooking up the OBD II reader tonight to try to diagnose that tonight.What I’m trying to say is I feel like I’ve been getting knocked around a lot lately. I’m bummed that my music keeps getting pushed to the background, but this can’t last. I’m going to take things as they come, keep breathing and make opportunities for music in my life.Keep the light on. I’ll be back.Rayzer

[hummingbird]

Apr 15, 2009, 4:27pm, rayzer wrote:Well, last Thursday we received the good news that her lymph nodes were clean! How awesome is that?totally awesome. So glad to hear that, rayzer!

[rayzer]

Quote:Quote:Well, last Thursday we received the good news that her lymph nodes were clean! How awesome is that? totally awesome. So glad to hear that, rayzer!Thanks, Hummingbird! We're still celebrating! Another (little) cause for celebration is that one car is fixed! It was a poorly designed PCV hose that collapsed on itself. All it took was a $45 (redesigned) part and a couple of hours to take a bunch of stuff off the car so I could reach the hose (which, of course, was on the back of the engine.)Little by little, step by step, car by car, I'm working my way back.Rayzer

[unit58studios]

Dear Rayzer,I really wouldn't worry about it - whats the rush unless you reallyhate your job.I had to wait till I was 50 years old having raised 4 great kidswith the wife.At 50 I sold my house to open up Unit58 Studios - how mad was that. I can write songs, play instruments everyday now.I always say I had to go and get 30 years good business trainingbefore I could start and run my own business in something I absolutely love.My Sales & Marketing & IT experience is excellent grounding for this mad business.So enjoy those kids everyday - wait till they are at least 18them pursue your dream like it was the last thing on earth.Nickwww.unit58.comwww.taxi.com/nrjiffy

[philschon]

Great news about your wife rayzer! Your uncle is right, just praise God for the good you have. Things could be alot, ALOT worse. But even then, He works it out.That said, here's my check-in...about 3 weeks ago I began to have what I think is an extreme crisis of faith. While I'm trying to write music, I'm also playing on the church worship team. The music I've been writing is not Christian. I've been having this nagging feeling that I can't do both. You know the thing about serving one master. Anyway, neither my writing or playing on the team had been going well for some time, so I packed all the gear away in cases so I don't have to look at it until I get some kind of sign as to what I'm supposed to do. It's a shame. I have this wonderful little studio, belong to Taxi, have a wife that lets me have my 'alone for music' time. And every single note that I am able to squeeze out, whether writing or playing on the team, comes at an unreal fight within myself. My problems pale in comparison with some of the others I've read about. I know that. I 've just lost the.... I don't know what. I guess I'm just a little off course. I really hope and pray that I can come back with an uplifting story in May.

[tedsingingfox]

Rayzer (and Phil and all the rest of you),Oh, man. How scary to hear about your three days of limbo, but what GREAT news to pull you out of said limbo.Things around here have been crazy busy and I've barely had any time to breathe, much less check the boards. This is truly feeling like a full-time gig. I PROMISE to come back in a day or two to get caught up, but for now I need to get home for one last quick rehearsal before my first official Nashville open mic performance tonight. Details later.And one more wooHOO!! for your wife's good news.Ted

[rayzer]

Hi Nick,Thanks for your perspective. I’m glad that you’re able to live your dream. It gives me hope for the future.I realize that this is just a season in my life and there will be a new day when my obligations will be fewer and I’ll have more room for music (Lord willing).This whole exercise in living deliberately made me aware of wasted time. Time is so precious, but also so easy to fritter away on nothing. I thought being deliberate was the universal solution, but lately unavoidable things have consumed all the time I carefully carved out of my day and left me nowhere else to go. I’m frustrated because there’s been absolutely no room for any forward motion during the past two months. However, I’m excited because the auditors will be done here by May 15 and my wife’s arm is healing, so there’s gotta be some time coming my way. I can’t wait. Rayzer

[rayzer]

Philschon,Thanks for checking in. I don’t know exactly where you’re coming from, but I decided to write about it anyway. What kind of music have you been writing? Is it satanic, anti-Christian music or is it just not overtly Christian? If you write about serving the devil and then go play in your church worship band I think you do have a problem that needs some attention. If you’re writing ‘secular’ pop, electric, jazz, classical, blues, country, or whatever that doesn’t go against your beliefs, why should that be a problem? A ‘Christian’ A=440’ is the same as a ‘secular’ A=440’. A D7 is a D7. If you are allowing God to use your life and your gifts, your work will be sacred, whether you’re writing a movie score, composing an oratorio, or picking up garbage, God is in it and will use it for his glory.Maybe you are having this struggle because God does want you to use your songwriting skills to praise him and show others the way more overtly and directly. If so, you should listen to Him, but don’t fall into the trap that God can’t use you if you’re not writing Christian music.What kind of music are you passionate about? What kind of music are you good at doing? Maybe that’s all you need to know. Go and do that for Him. If you’re wrong, He’ll bring you back.Keep us posted.Rayzer

[rayzer]

Hey Nashville Ted,How was the open mic?Rayzer