Impostor Syndrome

[HenriettaAtkin]

Russell,

Your posts about music (just read your advice to Sam Winski about EDM) always seem incredibly knowledgeable to me.

[Kolstad]

I feel your pain, Russell. Following Ralph Murphy, I guess we are all impostors, fake, slutz or trying to adapt to the situation at hand.

+1 to Ethan's brilliant post. I believe here's a fine line between self-doubt and self-reflection, where'as the latter is healthy and progressive, the former may throw us a curve ball.

[cardell]

My musical journey has always been somewhat in tandem with my spiritual journey.

Similar challenges for me.

Stuart

[HenriettaAtkin]

My musical journey has always been somewhat in tandem with my spiritual journey.

Similar challenges for me.

Stuart

+1. What I like to do after every music submission is go for a walk (great way to get into your spirit). Then I ask my heart (my authentic self) "What would you like to do next?" Then I do it.

This didn't come easy! I study with intuition teacher, Sonia Choquette. She defines success as "the very next thing". That is actually the true definition. Life usually only gives us the next step. It's up to us to trust it.

But anyway, back to the original subject. There ARE ways to get through this "Impostor Syndrome" and be productive. I've found the best way to do this is to get in "flow". Because, when you are "in flow", your self goes away. No fears, no expectations, no doubts. Just the music.

Totally! Being "in flow" is tuning into your authentic self -- your spirit. And when you do this, the Universe steps forward to meet you. You're never alone. God put you here to share your gifts -- and your gifts are outstanding, Russell!

[Paulie]

I guess we need to first define what the job is or what you are comparing yourself to, and then to define impostor. If the job is to create music that gets used, then an impostor is someone that claims to do so but doesn't. IMPORTANT: If you are getting music placed, you are not an impostor.

Now, if someone is equating music placement or creation with being a musician, they might be entering the world of impostor IF they are claiming to be a talented musician. But even THAT is a weak statement because what defines talented? Is it the ability to read music, play an instrument with years of study, practice and technique under your fingers, an understanding of theory and history. the ability to hear and decipher music quickly... or is it simply the ability to make an audience happy with your musical output?

There are millions of people out there that are not "musicians" in the academic sense, yet they create music and make audiences happy. Many make millions of dollars a year. Phil Collins can't read music, yet' he's done just fine. Same for Eric Clapton, or Stevie Ray Vaughan, and I've even heard that said about the Beatles, but cannot confirm.deny. And there are thousands of high quality musicians that barely get by, or have completely given up their craft due to a lack of success for whatever reasons. It is important that Taxi members remain focused on their goals and desires. and measure your success via tangible factors: forwards, placements, dollars, earned, etc. It doesn't matter what you mom or kid thinks about your music, unless your goal is to impress family members.

So, are you comparing yourself to trained musicians like John Williams? If so, that's a different story. Are you comparing yourself to Justin Bieber? Also a different story.

There are plenty of Taxi members with no formal music training and many that can't read music or tell you what they are doing when sitting in front of the keyboard. But what is the end game? Creation of music that someone will buy from you. How you get there is largely irrelevant. Granted, having a solid education can help you create product faster perhaps, but it is not a must have.

So, long story short (too late!), whether or not you are an impostor depends entirely on who you are comparing yourself with.

Russell, you are the wind beneath my wings, and you have the crystal obelisk to prove it.

[melodymessiah]

i've got the opposite problem, i'm struggling to get people to recognize my genious

[hummingbird]

I've often felt like an imposter. Especially when I was in the depths of my social phobia days, it always felt like everyone else knew what they were doing and I was the only one hanging on by my fingernails, trying to get it right but feeling like I never would. When I first started teaching singing I wondered what the heck I knew and worried I wasn't good enough. Over the years I've come to a place where I recognize that who I am is exactly is what is of value. The difference between me and any other voice teacher, aside from technique, is just that I am me, I walked my path, and I share my story with my students. Ergo, the difference between me and any other composer isn't just gear and skill set and genres. I hear sounds the way I hear sounds, and create musical collages with that sound, even if it's within the framework of a genre or subgenre, it's unique to me. It's me.

I learned this very well in a writing group I belonged to for a time. We'd all be given a theme (genre) and given five things we needed to incorporate into our story, and then we'd write for 5 minutes. Even with all those ingredients, every story was so markedly different from everyone else's it helped me to realize that my muse is unique to me.

I often tell my students, a singer sings. A writer writes. A painter paints. A composer composes. We do the art for arts sake, because it lights us up inside and therefore is meaningful. If someone buys what we produce, that's cool. We need to eat. But that's not why we do it. Added to that is the willingness to listen and learn from others on the path, and a humble knowledge that our skill set now is better than it was six months ago, whether or not it is yet recognized by the 'experts' or our 'success' in 'selling' our 'product' is spotty at best.

That's not being an imposter, it's being an artist on the path to being a better artist.

[Russell Landwehr]

According to the Wiki article: "Psychological research done in the early 1980s estimated that two out of five successful people consider themselves frauds and other studies have found that 70 percent of all people feel like impostors at one time or another."

That's a pretty hefty number. Either number.

An interesting thing about this "syndrome" (in my opinion) is that admitting to it could be pretty durn fearsome. What if telling people that you feel like a fraud makes them take a deeper look at you? OMG!

It always amazes me the kindred spirits I find here in the Forums:
Henrietta, YES, "flow"... the moments we are in tune with the Universe.
Paul, I think you've put your finger on something there... Yes, we compare ourselves to something. And often we find ourselves lacking. And that can cause us to move away and quit, or it can inspire us to continue to attempt to achieve.

I've often felt like an imposter. Especially when I was in the depths of my social phobia days, it always felt like everyone else knew what they were doing and I was the only one hanging on by my fingernails, trying to get it right but feeling like I never would.

YES! "Hanging on by my fingernails" That is EXACTLY what it feels like. Thanks for that image, Vikki.

In this business we have to keep pushing the boundaries. We have to continue to step outside the lines. We MUST live beyond our comfort zones or we absolutely CANNOT improve our craft and move forward. This is VERY uncomfortable. It can feel like a wild crazy ride on an razor's edge that could careen out of control at any moment.

That's the tragic beauty of it.

[hummingbird]

In this business we have to keep pushing the boundaries. We have to continue to step outside the lines. We MUST live beyond our comfort zones or we absolutely CANNOT improve our craft and move forward. This is VERY uncomfortable. It can feel like a wild crazy ride on an razor's edge that could careen out of control at any moment.

That's the tragic beauty of it.

*Smiles*

[TimWalter]

Russell
Thanks for baring your soul and starting this thread. I never would have thought that about you, and think more of you haviing started the post.

I found it instructive to read many of the comments. This is a great forum.

All the best to all.
Tim