Out Of A Deep, Dark Depression

[ernstinen]

Hi All,

I've made it out! I'm so happy that I kicked my depressive state that I can't put it into words.

My wife, Debra, says she hasn't seen me like I've been for the last few months since the late 80s. I would sleep for 24-48 hours, couldn't get out of bed, didn't eat, didn't shower, didn't exercise, didn't do nothin'.

This came from leaving all my friends in L.A. that I've known for 20 years, and moving up north. I even missed my "neighbor," if you can believe it!

For those of you who don't believe in modern medication for such a state I've been in, think again. The brain is an extremely complex entity, and I've been lucky enough to find a doctor (and have insurance to pay for it) who diagnosed me and helped me. Thanks, Doc!

I'm sorry for any negative posts I've made during this horrible time. All my thoughts were negative. ALL of them. I apologize, but I couldn't help it.

Please give positive thoughts for those unfortunate people who don't have health insurance. Most people who live on the street and seem to be "out of it" would be enormously helped if they HAD help. Those that say "We can't afford it," also think again how fortunate you are and how blessed you would be to help your fellow human beings.

My thanks to you all whom have stuck by me, given me comfort, and have appreciated my music, however weird, eclectic, and non-commercial it may have been in my posts. Music is my outlet for my emotions, as it should be yours.

Ern

[Casey H]

How long did the doctor say you have to stay on the "hair dryer in your ear" regimen?

Kidding.... Glad you are feeling better.

Casey

[mojobone]

Glad you're feeling better, Ern!

[cardell]

Great news Ern..."welcome back".

Stuart

[michael11]

Excellent news Ern!!!!


I believe the Hairdryer Therapy that Casey mentioned is being written up in Medical Journals as we speak!!!


No seriously,you have been so prolific recently with work of a fantastic standard,that in itself speaks volumes.



Michael.

[bamtone]

Glad to hear you're out of your slump! Welcome back.

[feaker66]

Ern

[Cruciform]

Good for you Ern.

[elser]

That's great Ern, I know how you're feeling. I said goodbye to my wife forever the day after my 50th birthday, about 10 days ago, and even though our relationship wasn't very good, the feeling of separation is terrible. I know it's just a matter of time and I'll recover like you have but that feeling of overwhelming sadness and loneliness is huge. Glad you're feeling better, I'll catch up soon.

[T&V Marino]

Hi Ern,

Welcome back!

As artists, musicians, composers, and songwriters, we all go down the "rabbit hole" from time to time. Tragically, some of our friends never found their way back up. So glad to hear you got help.

Music is great therapy, but so is a positive attitude and hanging around positive people. It's helped us so much in the past few years, especially two years ago when we were constantly facing rejection and everything felt so hopeless. We've since found a small circle of friends in the music industry (coincidentally, almost ALL of them are TAXI members!!), and these friends "get" us and we "get" them. We share in each other's victories and defeats. The TAXI Forum has been a great help, as well as the TAXI Rally.

Most of us been in the dark place, but it really helps to learn to how to cope with rejection and remain hopeful that good things lie ahead. That attitude has been a big secret to our success.

We wish you all the best, and HANG IN THERE!

~ Tracey & Vance Marino