My First Instrumental--have at it!

[kimdr]

This is a nice song. The intro really grabbed me, and the song seemed to build nicely. Then the song kicks in. The melody is nice, but sounded boring during the performance. If there's no singer, then the guitar needs to do the singing, and in this case the guitar did not sing, it just played the melody rather stiffly. Add some vibrato, sustain some notes and let them ring out with some vibrato, maybe a bend with some reverb and a touch of delay. The song has good production, and some good dynamics as well. The song is also well arranged and the performances on the other instruments are top notch. I do admire and appreciate the work that went into this song, it's much more focused than anything I have ever done.

[heinsite]

thank you kimdr--that's pretty much what the majority have said, one way or the other....i'm thinking about a redo (hear that marty??? LOL), but it'll have to wait...several other projects happening...and kitz--my friend, THERE IS NO RELATIONSHIP REALLY with any of the verses in the vocal version...LOL...but true. i wrote this as a stream of consciousness piece, with the theme being when it's all "said" and done, that the "character" is just puzzled at the twists and turns of life--so in effect, you understand the tune PERFECTLY, as that is what i was trying to do...wasn't as easy as some may think either, for such a simple piece. so you've hit the nail on the head, but then the question is does it work? i think so, but hell, not been forwarded, but i think it fits wonderfully (he says humbly...LOL) as a film piece or tv piece...anyway, thanks for the listens folks, the responses have been good bad and kinda ugly, but that's the forum at it's best. doing it's job me thinks....and those who pm'd me, muchas gracias as well!!all the best,warren

[michael11]

Hi Warren,your buddy Mick here from across the pond.I am going have to disagree with some folks and say,don't let words get in the way of a good melody and this is a really good melody supported by a very strong and effective chord structure.The instrumental has an atmosphere the vocal doesn't posses.I love Martin's arrangement and his guitar playing.Maybe it's a European thing,I don't know.I.ve always said your music seems more this side of the pond then yours!!!!

[heinsite]

hi michael!!hope all is cool with you over there--and yeah, you are the one that if somebody would sign me up for a few tunes, i'd actually fly over the pond and hang out for awhile...LOL...thanks for your words, they are exactly what i think, when all is said and done, although after all the comments, i might have marty do another rendition--why not? thanks my friend over there for again being very supportive--damn i wish you were a screener...!the best to you,warren

[liamkelly]

Nov 29, 2008, 11:37pm, heinsite wrote:i realize in this form i've kinda written an adult "lullaby". but i like it nontheless...So do I. A lot Good job, Warren, and good stuff from Martin too.

[heinsite]

liam my friend (and not sure, do i still owe you one beer, i think so...)anyway, thank you for the comment, means ALLOT to me.hope all is well with you across the pond, hey, damn maybe i SHOULD move there, between you and michael up there, and several other comments, at the least i should maybe look at some music "sources"/producers over there to have a listen...nonetheless, thanks again, cheers,warrenps: hell, i thought this thread was dead...it can now probably die it's natural....ps: am i daft, or have you ALWAYS been in barcelona??? just noticed that--damn that is one country (spain) that i've always wanted to visit, more than any other euro place, don't know why other than the california influences, weather, food, well, everything....xoxxoxo

[christophersclaybo]

I'm thinking, for the chorus sections, to maybe add some screaming guitar.When I heard the very first beginning of this song I thought, "Stairway to Heaven", by Led Zeppelin.Oh, just and so you know it I LIKED IT.Wild Man Chris