Need some Country feedback

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horacejesse
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Re: Need some Country feedback

Post by horacejesse » Tue Jun 12, 2007 10:35 am

Quote:Why don't we approach the debate this way....we can compile a list of non-Southerners who write great country music....you got a list?It is better that we just drop it instead of turning it into a contest. You have your view and I have mine. We both had our say and that is enough. It is enough to speak one's view. We won't try to change each other right here. I am sure your views are shared by many people. I don't share'em, but I do respect'em.Aub has a new version, so I am going to try to listen to that right now before work if the machine will cooperate.

horacejesse
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Re: Need some Country feedback

Post by horacejesse » Tue Jun 12, 2007 10:39 am

Hey, Aub,All I get is a blank, white screen and the message that the machine is through downloading.Anyone know the deal here? I usually have pretty good luck with Broadjam. What is this song on?

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Casey H
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Re: Need some Country feedback

Post by Casey H » Tue Jun 12, 2007 1:07 pm

Quote:Hey, Aub,All I get is a blank, white screen and the message that the machine is through downloading.Anyone know the deal here? I usually have pretty good luck with Broadjam. What is this song on?Did you try RIGHT clicking on the link and selecting "Save Target As"... you can download the file to your machine and then play it... Casey

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Re: Need some Country feedback

Post by jchitty » Tue Jun 12, 2007 1:47 pm

Quote:Quote:Why don't we approach the debate this way....we can compile a list of non-Southerners who write great country music....you got a list?It is better that we just drop it instead of turning it into a contest. You have your view and I have mine. We both had our say and that is enough. It is enough to speak one's view. We won't try to change each other right here. I am sure your views are shared by many people. I don't share'em, but I do respect'em.Aub has a new version, so I am going to try to listen to that right now before work if the machine will cooperate.Okay, it's a deal, Horace. Enjoyed the debate with you.BTW, I owe some folks some mails and PMs, but hubby got home from his business trip, so I'm spending some time with him tonight. Will answer tomorrow morning.

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Re: Need some Country feedback

Post by aubreyz » Tue Jun 12, 2007 2:43 pm

Quote:Hey, Aub,All I get is a blank, white screen and the message that the machine is through downloading.Anyone know the deal here? I usually have pretty good luck with Broadjam. What is this song on?Hey, I sent you a PM in case this doesn't work. Here's a Broadjam link:Graduation Day

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Re: Need some Country feedback

Post by horacejesse » Wed Jun 13, 2007 2:07 am

Thanks, Aub. I am listening to it several times. I also found that my computer had been storing MP3's I thought I was not receiving. Anyway...A lot can be said about this song. The opening lyrics are very effective IMO at setting up your scenario. Immediately I know it is a country song. When rock guys use the word "Momma" they are referring to their girlfriends. Ha. The lyrical treatment in general is solidly country. I enjoy your voice on this one, and your production is always far up the scale.Matt mentioned your abundant use of minors. I don't think it is a bad thing in itself, especially in the new stretchable country, but I do feel he pinpointed a weakness. After a while the heavy use of the iii chord starts to bring me down. At your hook itself is where I think you need an adjustment in the music, and I may just be treading in Matt's wake here. Your melody falls at "It was graduation day," like a downer onto that iii chord. I am going to suggest major-iz-ing the A minor chord right there to see how it affects the feel and the melody. You need some uplift where you seem to crash right onto your own hook.My instinct tells me to keep the Phyrigian feel at the beginning where it actually plays like a prelude that may not come back. But it is OK to bring it back at the death, maybe in the middle...Graduation and death together in the same song is tricky and a tall order for the writer because you have to keep interchanging uplifting and depressing. But it can be done and I have recently attempted something similar. You will only have to do one interchange at the end.If it were my song maybe I would work on the interior of it and try to get some uplift in. Technically, I think you need to change modes.Lyrically you have done well, but as you may know, "slip away" is one of my pet peeves in the world of cliche, and I would let it slip away. "Gets away," would even be preferable.With the right small changes this song might get amazingly good. Just my opinion.

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Re: Need some Country feedback

Post by horacejesse » Wed Jun 13, 2007 10:12 am

By the way, Aub, I am calling the A minor the iii chord because the key feels like F most of the time. The key is slightly vague here and there, which is not a bad thing at all. The G major as the second chord makes the listener think he is in C, but the rest of the chords say otherwise. That tension is what makes the Bb sound so oddball after the A minor--up to there it feels like the song is going to be in C. This is not bad, I am just trying to be more clear what I was talking about.

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