Joke of the Minute...

[ibanez468]

Jul 6, 2008, 6:29am, edteja wrote:Right. We all know the center of the universe is filled with songwriters. And guitarists!

[squids]

And pianists! I love that word. Ahhhhh. If you say it three times fast, it sounds like you're in need of a urologist. Heh

[ernstinen]

HaHaHa! Good ones, Squids and Ibanez!Here's an oldie but goodie (stop me if I've posted this before ). This came to mind when I was listening to the Allman Brothers' "Mountain Jam" yesterday ---Let's see --- who should be the protagonist in this story? How about --- Squids!Squids decides to take a safari deep into the jungles of Africa.On the first night, she hears drumming far off in the distance. Squids asks the guide "What's with the drumming?"The guide answers "Drums good --- very good!"The next night, the drumming began again. She asks another guide "Why do they drum at night?"The guide answers "Drums good --- very good!"By the end of the week, she had heard drumming every night. By this time, they were encamped with a friendly tribe far into the jungle up a river. She walks up to the tribe chieftan and asks him "I've heard drumming every night now! Why do they play the drums?"The chieftan replied "Drums good --- very good!"All of a sudden, the drums stopped.Squids asks the chieftan "Why have the drums stopped?"The chieftan had a concerned look on his face, and said "Drums stop --- very bad. Very bad."Squids says "Why is it bad that the drums have stopped?"The chieftan says to her "Now bass solo begin!"Ba-da-boom!Ern

[ibanez468]

O.K. Ernst..STOP!! Whoops! Too late. I'm afraid that's a repeat from somewhere on this here thread. No matter, a little refresher never hurt anything. I-468

[sgs4u]

How many bass players does it take to change a lite bulb? Too late, the keyboard player already got it done.

[johnnydean1]

Jul 7, 2008, 11:38am, sgs4u wrote: How many bass players does it take to change a lite bulb? Too late, the keyboard player already got it done. and made everybody else's life a misery because he broke a nail in the process!

[linziellen]

OK this is pretty original, here's me attempting to sing at random. I wrote the song for 50-90 but I've got me a weird cold and can't hear myself - I don't get very far and then my own freakin' lyric makes me laugh http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default ... 849970It's called "Answer-phone" I dread to think what would happen if I found myself in a recording studio Linzi

[ncc1701]

Jul 7, 2008, 11:38am, sgs4u wrote: How many bass players does it take to change a lite bulb? Too late, the keyboard player already got it done. How many country bass players does it take to change a light bulb?1...5...1...5...1...5...1...

[squids]

Jul 7, 2008, 1:23pm, linziellen wrote:OK this is pretty original, here's me attempting to sing at random. I wrote the song for 50-90 but I've got me a weird cold and can't hear myself - I don't get very far and then my own freakin' lyric makes me laugh http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default ... 849970It's called "Answer-phone" I dread to think what would happen if I found myself in a recording studio LinziNaw, that was no joke, honey. That was so good! I love your voice, especially at the end when you get to wailin. Nice!!Okay, the part where you cracked yose'f up was pretty funny.

[davekershaw]

Jul 11, 2008, 5:23am, ibanez468 wrote:Life After Death After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she stopped in to see you." A walker noticed an old lady sitting on her front step, so he walked up to her and said, 'I couldn't help noticing how happy you look!What is your secret?''I smoke ten cigars a day,' she said.'Before I go to bed, I smoke a nice big joint. Apart from that, I drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels every week, and eat only junk food. On week-ends , I pop pills, get laid, and do no other exercise at all.' 'That is absolutely amazing! How old are you?''Twenty-four,' she replied.