Joke of the Minute...

[sgs4u]

Quote:Mom, are you still awake? and I have read every one your jokes, Drew

[drew]

Quote:and I have read every one your jokes, Drewlol, you are risking brain damage if it's contagious

[edteja]

An Upscale BarC, E-flat and G entered a bar.The bartender said, "Sorry, I don't serve minors."The E-flat left and the C and G had an open fifth between them.After a few drinks, the fifth was diminished and the G was out flat.An F entered and tried to augment the situation but was not sharp enough.A D entered and excused himself to the bathroom, saying, "I'll just be a second."An A entered but the bartender wasn't convinced that this relative of C was not a minor.Then the bartender noticed a B-flat hiding at the end of the bar. "Get out, right now!" he exclaimed."You're the seventh minor I've found in this bar tonight."The next night the E-flat returned to the bar in a 3-piece suit.The bartender said, "You're looking sharp tonight. This could be a major development."This was the case, when the E-flat took off the suit and everything else to stand there au natural.Eventually, the C sobered up and realized in horror that he wasunder a rest.He was brought to trial, found guilty of contributing to thediminution of a minor, and was sentenced to ten years of D.S. without the possibility of a Coda.On appeal, he was found innocent of any wrongdoing, even accidental, because the accusation was bassless.The bartender decided he needed a rest -- and closed the bar.

[liamkelly]

~THE GUITAR PLAYER CHILI TASTER~DrewThis was brilliant. I emailed it to all of my friends. And we all concur. If you fancy a career in comedy, come to South Africa.!!!Liam

[edteja]

A 2006 study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year.Another study found that Americans drink an average of 22 gallons of beer a year.That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles per gallon.Not Bad.

[drew]

Quote:~THE GUITAR PLAYER CHILI TASTER~DrewThis was brilliant. I emailed it to all of my friends. And we all concur. If you fancy a career in comedy, come to South Africa.!!!Liam Liam,Glad you enjoyed that one but it was plagiarism. I wish I could write something that funny. I had tears in my eyes the first time I read it.

[drew]

There is only one difference between a madman and me. I am not mad.~ Salvador Dali

[nomiyah]

This is a video joke, guaranteed smile for all you producers...http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x12565 ... -fame-game

[davewalton]

Quote:This is a video joke, guaranteed smile for all you producers...http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x12565 ... -gameSTICK!!!! You ol' dawg... you never said that THIS is how you create those custom beats.

[oneeyewillie]

Wee Dougie was in the garden filling in a hole when his English neighbour peered over the fence. Interested in what the mad man was up to, he politely asked, 'What are you doing there, Dougie?' 'My goldfish died,' replied Wee Dougie tearfully without looking up, 'and I've just buried him.'The English neighbour was very concerned. 'That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?' Wee Dougie patted down the last heap of dirt then replied, 'That's because he's inside your ****ing cat.'