I walk into a horizon that fills with dark clouds.

[heinsite]

hey chris--my only suggestion is to be a WRITER, and let the pros and semi-pros do the rapping for you.fame is what you feel and imagine and see. you have talent man, but sometimes we have to let others help us.all the best,warrren

[sgs4u]

May 26, 2009, 10:13am, christophersclaybo wrote:I want to BE the fricking artist! I want to be noticed by the FEMALES! No one notices or gives a rat's ass shit about songwriters in the dark. SURE, they make millions, but... Money ALONE will not get me what I want! Sure, cosmetic surgeries, provided not one of the doctors F^cks up the procedure AND gets it right THE FIRST TIME, might make it so the girls give me a second glance...Then you will need to do the things that your favorite artists do. This post does not lead me to believe you are "being" an artist. Only that you want someone to wave a magic wand, and poof, reveal you as an artist, who didn't work at it. That's quite different. Maybe you need to re-evaluate the things you believe will get you where you want to go. Quote: I WANT TO BE ON THE STAGE feeling all that energy...Lots of Kareoke might be a cheap quick fix. Tried that yet?Quote:I want the validation I NEVER GOT growing up. Even most my family, though they love me dearly, were easily torn away from me when I'd be speaking. There were times I be animatedly explaining something to one of them, someone else would say something to them (as though I was never there), and the one I was talking so animatedly to simply turned away from me to hear what the newcomer wanted to say.)Many of us long to be the "hottie." Most if us only get brief, fleeting glimpses of it, unless we are strong enough to force our way there be pretending it until we carry around that feeling all the time. It's all about willpower. I'm a short, kinda fat, bald guy with a short penis. But I guarantee you I feel like HOTTIE. Not because people tell me tho. Quote:I LONG to be heard. I have a message I'm literally DYING (no, I am NOT going to commit suicide, so F^cking RELAX!) to get out. It is like a pressure cooker inside about to blow. I must curse God for not giving me the goods to say what I got to say--AND GET PEOPLE TO ACTUALLY LISTEN AND RESPOND!I bet everyone on this forum feels exactly like that. We all want to be heard, or at least I know I still do. The trick to getting listened to, is to find something to say that people WANT to listen to. That's up to you. I also have a suspicion that your particular body and mind, are what will make you special. Many of your posts seem to be angry and resenting that you have to deal with it. Sooner or later, I think you'll use your specialness to your advantage. Quote:(I STILL noticed NOBODY has left ONE goddamn comment on my goddamn you tube videos, IN SPITE OF the fact I asked. Gee, thanks alot! See, there's proof no one F^cking really LISTENS!) Why would people leave messages when you talk to us like you don't even like us? Quote:It just F^cking SUCKS to find out, when I thought I had come so far, I really am no better than I was, say, in 2001 when I was just a goddamn amateur!Personally, I'm trying to maintain the bulletproof headspace I had when I was 18. I'm 48 now. Every moment of every day, you can feel better if you choose to find something better to feel good about than your current thought. I think you need to reprogram your mind to stop telling yourself you suck. Because you only suck if that's what you tell yourself. No one here thinks you suck. Certainly not me. I remember your moment at the Rally, and how proud Michael was to introduce you.Remember that? You were a very inspiring son-of-a B in that moment. Watch this... And then watch this next guy, because he has made the world a better place by using his specialness. Life is what you make it Chris. Good luck.

[hummingbird]

May 26, 2009, 10:13am, christophersclaybo wrote:I STILL noticed NOBODY has left ONE goddamn comment on my goddamn you tube videos, IN SPITE OF the fact I asked. Gee, thanks alot! See, there's proof no one F^cking really LISTENS!!Christopher, I took the time to read your posts and respond. I took time out of my busy teaching day to listen and watch two videos. I took time to consider my feedback, write it, and post it here (rather than youtube). I gave you feedback based on my professional experience as a voice teacher that people pay me money for... for free. Why? Because I care, because I want to help. Many people have posted on this thread in support of you, because they understand your dream, and they understand your frustration.The issue with your left arm could be resolved by sticking your hand in your pocket when you are performing. The issue with tension in your neck and shoulders (a common problem with singers) can be resolved in any number of ways. Answers can be found for most things we have to deal with.As to the rest, it's no one else's responsibility to make you an artist. Figure out what you have to do to develop your talent and skills, and set out to do it. Be someone people want to work with, because you are fun and easy to work with. Have attitude in your performance, but not backstage.I think everyone on this forum knows what it feels like to want to be an artist/songwriter/musician and struggle against the seeming disinterest of the industry, etc. Yeah, many times it feels like life isn't fair. In spite of all the odds, though, we are here making music and growing towards getting forwards and signing deals... because we are not willing to give up, and because there is a way to make it happen if we are willing to listen & learn, and if we are willing to do the work.I don't know if you've ever taken the time to read my blog or my story on my website. I didn't have things so good for many years. I have scars on my face and I'm partially deaf, and I was so acutely shy that I literally could not stand on stage and perform because I shook so badly. But here I am performing regularly and writing music & recording music and teaching other people how to overcome their shyness and become the singers they dream of being. I am endlessly grateful for the support of my teachers and my peers in my continued growth... I am finally the musician I was meant to be. It's only taken 19 years to get here.

[cmrmurray]

Chris, what strikes me about your approach is that you seem to put all of your energy into one song over prolonged periods of time, though I infer from your profile that you do have more than one tune to your name. True, it's possible to spread yourself too thin, but you'll need to give at least three songs your time and love to have a decent chance I think, and finding out which one people seem to like best can be surprising and useful.

[squids]

Chris:You're not at all acknowledging the many kind and supportive comments RIGHT HERE. I don't think this has a thing to do with God giving you a break, honey. You need to give yourself one. Demanding that people support you when you want them to support you in the way you want them to is only going to cause you heartache. I would spend all this rage on writing. And maybe you could stop dropping the f bomb on a public forum, that might help a little too. I get that it's all part of the genre but I know a few rap artists who understand that image is everything and they need to show respect to get it in return.Just my suggestion. I'm done with this thread. Good luck.

[ggalen]

Chris,On YouTube there are always people who make cruel comments. Just ignore them, and do not argue with them.Listen to the people on Taxi who have helped you.Here's the answer: You will be happy when YOU realize that you are OK... just the way you are, with your strengths and your weaknesses.Now... try helping other people any way you can, without expecting anything back. Try to do something nice for someone else every day. Just to do it to help them. You will feel better.Your life will get better and better.

[hummingbird]

May 28, 2009, 7:43am, ggalen wrote:Now... try helping other people any way you can, without expecting anything back. excellent advice.Chris, you don't have only haters. You have here, on this forum, a long thread with many positive and helpful and thoughtful comments in support of you, your artistry and your dreams.I too hope you are not planning surgeries so that you will 'get females'. Females aren't attracted to men who rant and rave and make demands. They are attracted to men who listen, men who are working on themselves & their self-esteem, and men who gentle, kind, thoughtful & romantic. Men who can lift their spirits on a bad day. Be a fully actualized man who lives in the present moment and is walking his path with sincerity and humour, and looks just aren't that important. The positive spirit is attractive. The truth is that success comes from within, not without. Suggested resources:Eckhart Tolle - The New EarthJulia Cameron - The Artist's WayDr Wayne Dyer - You'll See It When You Believe It.

[christophersclaybo]

Good news!!!I posted a song I wrote (way back in 1998), singing it accapella, on youtube, called "The Inward Pain". A musician who lives in LA, named "Pinkstar", whom I met just recently on Facebook, told me she would put some music to it! (Incidentally, I had previously met this girl at the 2005 Road Rally, and we became friends after I touched her head and told her it was because she was cute and I liked her pink hair.)She told me it was "intense anger" and that she would have me a scratch track by the end of this week. Tough song, I wouldn't advise anyone to listen to it, but if anyone dares to hear it, here is the link...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GkVWa3jSCe0Oh, and this was WAY BACK IN 1998, how I was feeling WAY BACK THEN... LONG before I knew of Taxi, the Taxi Road Rally, any of y'all folks... And NO, I AM NOT SUICIDAL! This song is NOT rap, it is punk heavy metal, I guess, I don't frickin' know WHAT to call it.(Actually it was written as a poem, but since I have found I could actually sing it I thought, what the heck, why not use it as a song?)Forget my rants about not being able to get music for my songs. Thanks to Michael Laskow and a few well-placed contacts I met @ preious Road Rallies, I got another song that will soon have music to it.

[suzdoyle]

May 28, 2009, 7:43am, ggalen wrote:Chris,On YouTube there are always people who make cruel comments. Just ignore them, and do not argue with them.Listen to the people on Taxi who have helped you.Here's the answer: You will be happy when YOU realize that you are OK... just the way you are, with your strengths and your weaknesses.Now... try helping other people any way you can, without expecting anything back. Try to do something nice for someone else every day. Just to do it to help them. You will feel better.Your life will get better and better. Well said, Glenn. ,Suz

[Ellwood]

You break my windows out bro, and you will have more to deal with than dark clouds! that is a guarantee crybaby! man up Mr.