Joke of the Minute...

[linziellen]

OK this is pretty original, here's me attempting to sing at random. I wrote the song for 50-90 but I've got me a weird cold and can't hear myself - I don't get very far and then my own freakin' lyric makes me laugh http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default ... 849970It's called "Answer-phone" I dread to think what would happen if I found myself in a recording studio Linzi

[ncc1701]

Jul 7, 2008, 11:38am, sgs4u wrote: How many bass players does it take to change a lite bulb? Too late, the keyboard player already got it done. How many country bass players does it take to change a light bulb?1...5...1...5...1...5...1...

[squids]

Jul 7, 2008, 1:23pm, linziellen wrote:OK this is pretty original, here's me attempting to sing at random. I wrote the song for 50-90 but I've got me a weird cold and can't hear myself - I don't get very far and then my own freakin' lyric makes me laugh http://www.soundclick.com/bands/default ... 849970It's called "Answer-phone" I dread to think what would happen if I found myself in a recording studio LinziNaw, that was no joke, honey. That was so good! I love your voice, especially at the end when you get to wailin. Nice!!Okay, the part where you cracked yose'f up was pretty funny.

[drew]

If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?~ Steven Wright

[acousticeel]

What's the difference between a singer/songwriter and a large pizza?A large pizza can feed a family of four.....

[acousticeel]

Q. Why did the punk rocker cross the road?A. He had a chicken stapled to his ear...

[jchitty]

Jul 9, 2008, 11:26am, acousticeel wrote:What's the difference between a singer/songwriter and a large pizza?A large pizza can feed a family of four.....LOL!

[ibanez468]

Life After Death "Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees. "Yes, Sir." the employee replied. "Well, then, that makes everything just fine," the boss went on. "After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she stopped in to see you."

[davekershaw]

Jul 11, 2008, 5:23am, ibanez468 wrote:Life After Death After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she stopped in to see you." A walker noticed an old lady sitting on her front step, so he walked up to her and said, 'I couldn't help noticing how happy you look!What is your secret?''I smoke ten cigars a day,' she said.'Before I go to bed, I smoke a nice big joint. Apart from that, I drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels every week, and eat only junk food. On week-ends , I pop pills, get laid, and do no other exercise at all.' 'That is absolutely amazing! How old are you?''Twenty-four,' she replied.

[bmete]

The Misunderstood Samaritan In a crowded city at a busy bus stop, a beautiful young woman wearing a tight leather skirt was waiting for a bus. As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. She tried to take the step, only to discover that she couldn't. So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little more, and for the second time attempted the step. Once again, much to her chagrin, she could not raise her leg. With a little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip a little more and again was unable to take the step. About this time, a large Texan who was standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus. She went ballistic and turned to the would-be Samaritan and screeched, "How dare you touch my body! I don't even know you!" The Texan smiled and drawled, "Well, ma"am, normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured we was friends."